Monday was an absolute slog in my heavy drinking days. It took all I had to get to the end of the working day (if I went to work) just so I could start swamping beer again 
Tuesday was not easy with no “Monday beers” to look forward to.
I’m happy that’s behind me. I’m focusing on saving my money for some trips coming up next year. I’m doing some work at home. And I will absolutely, without doubt… Probably, cut my grass this evening as well 
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Checking in day 168.
Missed a couple days as the weekend was crazy busy with the kids and back at work today. Hope everyone is going great!
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Checking in on this holiday Monday in the US. I’ve had the best weekend since I can remember, productive, restful, thoughtful, and peaceful. Which was much needed after a really hard week last week, ugh it was bad. But this weekend I had quality time with my fella, lots of good conversation, and even though he drank a significant amount a couple nights I had minimal cravings or FOMO feelings (fear of missing out). The reason this long weekend went so well is because I was sober and happily so, focused on lots of activities but also on just BEING. Being present and taking time to look at the world around me. My husband is pretty much a normie, he makes choices to drink when he wants to and can put it down any time and does. It boggles my mind, and for the longest time I tried to follow his example. It took way too long for me to understand that I couldn’t follow suit. And I’ve gone back and forth on how I feel about that, but for now I’m at peace with it. Who knows how I’ll feel tomorrow 
Joking. Therapy is work! But well worth it. Just starting to take a look at my relationship in talks with my therapist so that should be interesting.
I’ve been absent but read a bit every day. I’m glad I checked in today. I think about my friends here often, you all are on my mind and I send you my love and support even when I don’t post. Sober strength and good vibes your way, amix/friends. 
Pic is of my meadow transitioning to late summer/early fall. Lots of walks in the meadow this weekend and some perfect cooler weather was so therapeutic.
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so nice to hear from you. Miss your energy. Love 
151 days sober
I went to the school first thing this morning to talk to the schools director and the teachers to tell the orphans situation with their uniforms. I was very blunt and direct about it all. I think the teachers are a bit afraid of me so hopefully that translates into the kids being treated properly. Hopefully so. 
I went home after to attend my online counseling session. We had a really good conversation about what I brought up the other day about feeling like I’m just now grieving for my family and how to cope with this. I felt good about it. Today I had more questions and received a lot of good answers/advice. I felt good afterwards.
I went to the bazaar after to find a seller who would be willing to trade the new uniforms for a sheep. That went over well but the biggest hassle was delivering the sheep which I will do tomorrow. Then need to bring the uniforms to the kids and have their names written in the collar.
It was a very productive day but I didn’t get any time to be able to work on the translation. I’m hoping to bunker down in the morning to get more work done on it.
I’m in for the night relaxing now. Hope everyone is having a good sober day!
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Another day
Just checking in
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You are a kind person Laner 
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Day 185
Welcome September 2! Relaxing cloudy skies. I slept 10 hours. Insomnia keeps trying to come back but sleep is much stronger. Now I’m finally recovering. Until I can sleep I’m a wreck. Now I’m myself. Who’s that? I like to sing.
It’s a day to dream and mayyyybe, clean. I’m in my Fall happy mood where I bake things. Summer is 
. But now, we cool off and enjoy.
Enjoy your sober days! 
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Checking in 13.5 months AF.
Resetting on junk food. Day 1.
Sending strength and love to all!
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Checking in at 113 days. Been MIA, but all is well. Feels good to read posts here. All successes whether we are getting back up and dusting ourselves off or on a continual streak. We only fail when we stop trying.
Have a good day/night all!
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@Dan.h84 & @CATMANCAM Thanks friends. @acromouse I’ve got a friend flying in Wednesday morning and we’ll spend most of the time together. Planning on being a week out of town, not sure where yet, the weather predictions are confusing and changing by the day. It’ll be fun anyway.
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So glad you slept well and for so long!
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1052 AF
Good morning, gang.
Happy Labor Day.
We’re still in bed. Watched a movie last night with my eldest. It was his first time watching The Lord of The Rings. He loved it. Gonna watch the LOTR: The Two Towers today.
Gonna make a cup coffee in a bit and then do laundry.
Have a great holiday, gang. Stay strong. Stay sober.
Luv y’all. ODAAT
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i think i forgot to check in yesterday? but at noon today (MST) i’ll have a full 72 hours sober :] couldn’t do it without the support of my fellows, thank you all !
straight up, i’m scared yall. i didn’t go to rehab this time, didn’t get into sober living, i’m just doing the damn thing. i’m being drawn and pulled to this forum, meetings, and other support groups by a force i can’t explain (my Higher Power).
so i guess i’m feelin needy rn, needing lots of support throughout each day to keep my mind right and it makes me feel guilty. i’m sticking around tho, and i hope yall will too! much love, my friends, and i hope you’re well <3
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Feeling the urges pretty badly today. I’m around 4 days clean from looking at porn.
I feel like i keep lying to myself about sexual media though.
I fantasized about porn in my head this morning and went to the app store and looked at sexual media there.
Looking at women with skimpy clothes on (sexual media) i think still keeps me in this addiction.
I need to change how i view sexual media. It should be treated as badly as porn.
I keep thinking i can swear off internet porn, but i’ll just get a playboy in the future…but that is still continuing the addiction (it just might not be as bad as internet porn for you)
I think of it like this;
Would my future wife want me to secretly by myself to jerk it to other women in a magazine or online instead of having sex with her when i am horny?
No
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Hi there
I lived here for those first days, weeks. Did not care about anything else. It’s a life or death choice for me, I can’t play around and pretend there is something good for me in alcohol. Stick close; we’ve been where you are and understand.
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7y8m19d
I’m going to fit in some self care today and try for less social media. I was in a bit of a funk yesterday and am hoping this is the solution. I’m going to get a half hour chair massage and also get a pedi. This is the last of our cooler weather for a while since there is a heat wave coming next week. Hope everyone has a great sober day! I’ll be enjoying the holiday sober.
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@alicat22 Thanks friend. Getting a bit better each day. Hope you start to feel better soon
@bomdhil appreciate you Thomas! Grateful that you are leaning in to your HP. Really helps me feel like I belong in this universe and not feel alone. Keep going my friend – you are doing great. Just read the line “its ok not to be ok” and i know I’ve heard this many times but it always hits home when I am down 
@danam56 thank you so much! Oh how fun – hope your son has a wonderful birthday celebration. You look fantastic for having a 39 year old son
@butterflymoonwoman Oh i am glad that eating and drinking helped with the unwell feelings as you were walking I do hope you are able to get an appointment soon to help with your nose.
@shel75 sorry you were not able to get the meds sorted out. Glad you did not let that ruin your weekend but hope that you do get it sorted quickly
@selflove_42 Trying to self regulate your actions is hard cause we are our worst critics and harder on ourselves. I know our actions need to have consequences and deterrents but it is hard to see for ourselves how much is too much or too little and where to be gentle. Sending hugs Ooh i like what Menmo said about rewarding good behavior is far more productive than punishing ourselves
@mrsodh Oh i do love this upcoming season and love how the weather is changing and PSL is now available everywhere. Enjoy! I too love the bangs and understand the frustration with them. I used to pin them back until they grew longer 
@sabrina80 WOOT WOOT – you go on girl – 700 + days and going strong 
@catmancam thanks Cam. I am resting today and hope that the headache just goes away LOL. Great work on getting to the pool – sucks that it was closed. Hope you are able to check out the gym and changing rooms properly soon YUCK realistic dreams – they suck hard. Glad they are not our reality Congrats on your 1 week of no binging! Hope your therapy session goes well
@lighter Love the new avatar. OMG i’m so sorry for the PTSD. Grateful that you are safe and were able to settle. Hope you are doing better now friend. YEAH to getting more sleep – i for sure am not myself when i am in zombie formation… i need to feel right with temp and energy to function
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@mrfantastik Hope you enjoyed your Fathers day. Sounds like a great way to celebrate with the family Way to go friend – 9 months is amazing work 
@Seizetheday Congrats on your 8 months Hanna! Great work on not giving into that wobble – they do still come but luckily we have the tools and the sense to overcome em
@teefgub Welcome to the community Jesse – grateful that you found us and are here working on your recovery – ODAAT and we are all here to keep each other on the forward path 72 hours is fantastic. I was on this place all the time when I first found it early in my journey. I could not get enough and was so very grateful for all the threads (the support and wisdom and advice) that was here. Plus the just for fun threads were nice to keep me distracted. You are not needy my friend… you are in need of not feeling alone… keep connected here and with meetings – support is essential for us on this recovery path
@tyland Sorry for the day you experienced my friend – it is hard to move forward when you are hurting but to know that time does heal all wounds. I know its hard to imagine when you are in the thick of it but it is true. Keep doing what you are doing and I hope you start feeling good and some solid relief soon
@juli1 Woohoo – new job week – wishing you the best of luck my friend!
@1in8billion WOW – i love this and thank you for the list of positive affirmations. We do all need a friendly reminder of how awesome we are 
@laner grateful to hear that the lady did come forward and did try to make things right. Does not excuse her behavior at all. Just grateful that the kids will get the uniforms. Hopefully the first day was not bad for them and you were able to get empathy from the teachers grateful for all that you do.
@pattycake thanks friend. A bit better but not 100%. I’ll take it. Way to go on your junk food counter Each day without the junk food is a win. Keep pushing forward
@asp Welcome to the community Adam. Great to have you here with us and on day 2!!! That is awesome work – keep going strong and stay connected Support and finding ways to keep busy were key in my journey. Read around and join in on the threads – loads of amazing support and advice here
@jules000 Super exciting that your move is 2 weeks away and that is fantastic news on the company furnishing your apartment for free – how cool is that? Love this for you
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@sissychris39 WOW that is awesome – double digits for no shopping and 2 weeks of no binging
@hakeemosman Way to go friend – so good to see you checking in and with 1 week milestone
@mno sorry that your weekend was so tiring and hard but grateful that you now get to enjoy a 3 week vacation! Have a blast celebrating your time off with your friend
@tragicfarinelli Sorry friend – nightmares are exhausting on so many levels. Hope you are able to relax and gain some energy today
@zzz Grateful that you had a successful launch! Way to go friend Great video
@dan.h84 YEAH to double 4’s! Longest streak is anwesome feeling – keep going friend – you ain’t seen nothing yet
@rosacando Oh so lovely to see you posting and grateful that you did have a wonderful weekend.
@lifewarrior135 Welcome to the community Ted! Recovery is not easy but as we find new ways to cope with our DOC and avoid the triggers that could lead us backwards – we gain our sober muscles and are able to fight another day. 4 days is impressive work – stay strong!
@kareness OOH self care day sounds lovely and I do hope that it helps get you out of the funk.
Checking in on Monday afternoon – Happy Labor Day!
621 Days free of alcohol and weed
1036 days free of cigarettes
Allergies are unreal today. My nose feels raw from blowing it so much LOL. Head and body still not great but a bit better. Just going to enjoy the sunshine from indoors today. Not feeling like doing much of anything today.
Wishing you all a wonderful addiction free day - sending you all so much love
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