Hi…first time I’ve really tried to do this. I have drunk pretty regularly for around 40 years…minus pregnancies. I have always been aware that I use alcohol as a social prop and to deal with work stress, but I’ve always considered myself pretty functional, if missing out the ‘alcoholic’ descriptor.
I have realised that I will drink myself into an early death, I need to make some big changes. The alcohol is becoming out of control, And my family have started to comment more. I’m soo tired with having no memory when im drinking, and not functioning too well the next day. Ive realised i need to change the bits about my life i can change… and find new ways to live with the rest.
I’m lucky that I manage to work, as nurse as it happens, and if I carry on like this I won’t be able to.
Very scary…and quite an eye opener admitting it to myself
Welcome! There is some great support on here, reach out or post if you’re struggling (or doing great, or happy, sad, concerned, whatever!) Admitting that there is a problem was the hardest part for me.
Admitting it to yourself is a first step, admitting to others as you’ve done here is another. Your on the right track and i really wish i could tell you it’s going to be easy from here on out but what in life wirth doing is?
Focus on today and on the steps you’ve already taken… reach out when you need support because it’s here if you need it.
Stay strong, stay sober…
Keep your chin up, were all in this together!
Hi & welcome @Million, it’s nice to meet you 
Thank you for being brave enough to open up and share your story - I admire your honesty and I can relate to your story a lot.
Alcohol is my issue and I too used it for coping with work / home stresses and to relax & socialize.
You sound determined and i can tell by your post you have thought this through - you’ll find a lot of information, advice and support on this forum. Such lovely people here.
I wish you all the very best & hope to see you around 
Welcome @Million, so glad you joined us on this journey!
I also believed I was a ‘high functioning’ drunk. Held on to my job, the husband, the house and cars; never been arrested or had a DUI. I thought I was doing ‘ok’. Like you, my drinking has escalated. I’ve had the comments from friends and loved ones. I’ve awoken the next day thinking I had one bottle of wine, to find that I had several. And then, when that wasn’t enough, I turned to hard liquor - which I don’t even like! I have blacked out so many times while drinking. I wake up in the morning not remember half the night - what I said or what I did. The fear of that would start the moment my eyes opened in the very fuzzy morning.
I knew changes had to be made and quickly. I went back to AA (I’ve been in and out for years), got a sponsor, and started working the steps. Sobriety has to be the first priority in my life or I won’t have a life. I know I was drinking myself to death. I admire your honesty in your share and hope you will stay with us through your journey. We can all use the mutual support. Thank you and stay strong!
Thanks so much guys for the welcome! Expecting my cousin next weekend, so I’ve forewarned her about the changes.hard part is I think she’s gonna think I’m so boring if I haven’t had a drink…
I’m sure she’ll understand.already said she’s bringing irnbru rather than gin or wine 
Hi @Million and welcome to the forum. 
Congrats on taking the first big step.
4 years or 40 years, it’s never too late to become sober! There is so much support available out there these days, and you will never regret it once past the initial struggle.
Here is a useful thread on getting through early recovery:
(Surviving Alcohol Withdrawal/Early Sobriety Techniques)
And recovery-related links that members have posted:
(Different Aspects of Recovery)
Note that this forum is also available from any browser at talkingsober.com