I’m finding so much comfort already just reading through the threads. I posted once already in a new topic and got some great advice and encouragement so, thank you to those who I’ve already met :).
Anyway, I’m Alex and I’m 30 years old. I’ve been debating quitting drinking for a few years and have been drinking heavily for around 10 years. I’ve blacked out an infinite number of times and routinely would throw up for hours from 6 am until at least noon after a night of drinking (with or without blackouts). I’ve had too many embarrassing conversations to count and gotten violent on more than one occasion. Sometimes I’ll end up just sobbing all night over the most trivial things.
It’s like forest gump, I never know what I’m going to get in my box of drunk chocolates.
The tricky thing for me was coming to a realization that this is even a problem since many days I could just have one drink and be fine. I never know when I’m going to fall down the rabbit hole, so to speak.
The unpredictability of what’s going to happen after the first drink along with a recent diagnosis of mild fatty liver has led me here. I’m honestly just glad that at this point I haven’t done more damage to my body and can create a new, healthy lifestyle for myself one step at a time.
I know in time the embarrassment over the things I’ve done will fade. I just never ever want to feel that horrible regret of " what the fffff did I do/ say last night"? again.
Looking forward to staying clean with all you lovely people.