I totally understand - and I have been there.
It’s just habit, it’s because it’s what you’ve done, everytime something good or bad happens, or because it’s Friday, or a Holiday or after 7pm, and then eventually it’s to get you through the day, to sleep and …well, as I said, the rabbit hole’s deep.
Just a habit, keep that in mind. And EVERY time you get to the trigger point and DON’T do what habit dictates, you rewire yourself, change the circuit, run the new path.
Believe this - one day you will drive to a bar, gig, club, spend hours with friends, laugh, have fun Sober, enjoy yourself, drive home, get a good night’s sleep and wake up feeling great.
All of the old habits will have been turned on their heads and YOU will be in control of your life.
You do need to put the work in now though @Antonette_Tanya.
Fantastic to hear the AA meeting went well!
I really like that. Rewiring my brain. That statement has made me feel hopeful. Thanks so much!! Distracting myself with a crossword with my dad lol 
And isn’t that brilliant! - don’t want to sound like a drama queen but I would give anything in exchange for spending 15 minutes with my parents. So true that you don’t appreciate anything until it’s gone. Cherish that distraction!
Hi everyone! This is a really cool app the more things to help us to stay sober the better! Today I have 58 days! I’ve been in the program many times before but I’ve never been more serious about it as I am now. It is literally a life or death matter. It took me a long time to realize that. I’ve been going to meetings and working the steps with my sponsor. I’m looking forward to getting to know you guys!
All great news Karen!! Welcome🙂
I have read and understand the rules and I will follow them to the best of my ability. Hello! My name is Curtis Ellis, and though my story is different, it does have one thing in common with many of you, my use of alcohol. I thank God for where I am today and have been clean since 5 Jan 2015. I took some time away from many things that I could use as a “trigger” and though I found myself, I lost many “friends and acquaintances”. No worries about that though, and I really like where I am and my control over my life now. I will admit that, for the most part, I do spend a lot of time alone, but I’m ok with that. I’ve finally gotten my life together, paid off the cost of TWO DUI’s (lost my driving privileges for a year, jail time and did the interlock device for 1 year). And? Here’s where things are beginning to change for me. I spent a little over two years cleaning myself up and was fortunate enough to keep my job after the second DUI, and now that I’m no longer under water and I’m breathing easy, I do find myself missing the life… Not the drinking, but association of activities from drinking… Crazy, huh? I’ve found myself thinking about this a lot, thus the reason I decided to join this site to be able to express myself and get encouragement when needed. I don’t plan on drinking again, but I also know that those plans can easily turn into “famous last words”. I did visit one of my old hang outs, the VFW here in town (I’m a retired USAF Master Sergeant and a member there) and was shocked a bit. Most people I had drank a lot with didn’t know how to take me now, and after they had a few (diet coke for me), I couldn’t believe that’s the way I use to act. And the smell! (since I quit drinking, I didn’t have a reason to smoke, so that went away as well, 2 years this month). Was this what I was missing? Needless to say I don’t go there much, especially after hearing “you were more fun when you were drinking…” (from an ex-something… the relationship was always centered on alcohol, so I’m not sure what it was…) No, I didn’t let it bother me as this was after they had had a few. So, I keep myself busy with work, gym, mountain biking and various hobbies, to include my 10 rats! LOL! Anyway, that’s me, and if anyone has any questions for me, please feel free to ask.
@LoneWolfWithin. I just retired from the Army (21 years) and only have about 5 months clean time. I also seem to be more of a loner but also like and cherish (and miss) that bond of those in arms. I have avoided the VFWs and other watering holes as my recovery is too fragile. Somehow, the “thrill or adventure” associated with alcohol cannot be recreated while sober. I do hope I can embrace other activities in life you have obtained.
hey everyone,
my name is sabrina, i’m 36 and live in a small town near bonn in germany. i started drinking when i was jobless 7 years ago. it started slowly with every 2. weekend some beers f.e. or half a bottle of wine. but then bit by bit got worse. some weeks ago i did drink one bottle of vodka all alone. months ago i did ride my bike after i had one bottle of wine. i started to drink in the middle of the week because i thought i could relax better after a long day at work. my skin got worse and worse, i was in hospital often because of my skin (abscesses). my body did scream at me to please stop that. i wasn’t the one i was in the past, i totally lost my ability to be creative, to build something or to paint. i did not enjoy music any more, i did hate myself. i wanted to drink til i die. but then, from now to then, something changed. it did click in my head.
now i’m clean since 16 days, and i enjoy it so so much to become a better version of me. life has a sense again. my senses do improve again (totay i was sitting at the bus station, just enjoying the warm sun, the wind and to watch some ppl hehe). i am 100% awake again, and that feels so f**** great!
i don’t ever want to drink again! this chapter is over.
Hello, I’m from London and new to this forum. I’ve been struggling with alcohol addiction for almost 8 years. I’ve slowly lost contact with lots of people and become very isolated. Earlier this year I managed to give up smoking but have been struggling to quit drinking.
I work hard during the day, but feel compelled to have a relaxing drink of wine each evening…which turns into the whole bottle. Every night! I’m hoping to quit and live a healthier and happier life.
I just need to be strong and find the will power. I’m so inspired by reading some of the posts here too
I am new here , have been sober for a month and am an alcoholic addict. So I hope to stay one day strong at a time.
Hey there Iam originally from Chicago, IL but moved to Arizona at the end of may. I had to change my people, and places. I have 150 days under my belt I was a heroin/cocaine addict and drinker. I just did my story on fb if anyone is interested. I needed to tell my story so people can realize that addiction is a brain disease.
It takes one person to believe in you and give you a second chance. Don’t give up hope!
Hi, my name is Ana, I’m 26 and live in Zagreb, Croatia.
I’ve been drinking since I was 14, and I’m a social drinker without any self-control, leading to many embarassing situations. I know my main problem is my emotional state and drinking sort of helps me forget about my problems (which are many and are growing with time), but instead of resolving them, I start drinking. I don’t drink all the time, but when I do I make a fool of myself every time.
I am a person that tries to establish a certain place in society at the moment, but my drunk talking is going to destroy me. When drunk I have no rules, I insult everybody and pretend that I’m the most qualified person in everything I do, which is soooooo far from the truth. I am super low on self-esteem, I am still at university because of my laziness, and even though I exceed at my part time jobs, I’m affraid my drunken mouth will be my downfall.
I have friends who were the same as me in our teenage years but have since grown out of the phase, while I still am the same, or even worse and their patience is decreasing. It has even resulted in situations where I’m not even invited to go out with them anymore. And when I finally do go out it turns out a disaster.
I know I must stop, I’ve known for the past 5 years, but I just can’t help myself.
Hi everyone. Alcoholic here. I went through something traumatic a year ago and while I’ve been able to control my drinking for the most part I spiralled out of control starting in May. I now have a bottle or two of wine almost every night just to deal with the trauma and isolation but I’m trying to finally quit AGAIN. I’m also terrified I’ll have really bad detox symptoms if I go cold turkey so if anyone has any advice please let me know!
Maybe if you try talking about it (the traumatic event) with somebody you’ll feel easier.
I’ve been seeing a therapist for almost a year. She doesn’t know about my drinking though
But why? How evere big your secret may be, you know you can always trust a therapist. They won’t judge you and are prepared to hear anything. That is why I urge you to come out
I think it takes time to build genuine trust with a therapist. Also, to admit your struggle to them - saying it out loud - is to truly andmit it to yourself. I agree that it’s important to tell them, but there may be some real significance in the fact that you haven’t. But that you’re being open on here is a great step in the right direction @Try2change
Hi everyone. Alcoholic here. I guess I’ve known I was an alcoholic for at least the past 2 years but it wasn’t until recently that I’ve seen it as a problem. Before I was content that I was a functioning drinker and I never really did anything extremely bad … in hindsight, I’ve had a really bad couple of years. I’m in my mid 20s and have enjoyed “regular binge drinking” since 17. It wasn’t until about 3 years ago that I started to drink during the week … then what went from a 26 oz a week turned into almost a 26 oz a day. I lost my girlfriend of 5 years … my job performance went downhill … I gained 50 lbs. I’ve driven drunk, put myself in danger many times, engaged in unsafe sexual acts and been a bad friend and son on many occasions. Starting last spring I decided to cut back … all summer I would drink two 26 oz during the week and one 26oz on a Friday or Saturday night. Well I think I have reverse tolerance developed because I used to be able to drink a bottle and get up for work feeling fine … now… half a bottle and I’m near black out and suffer extreme anxiety and depression the following day. I truly believe I have damaged my liver and I count myself lucky I havent landed in jail or hurt someone. I love being drunk and I love drinking both socially and alone… but I have no choice but to give it up if I have any hope of a happy and healthy life.
Also should mention, I’ve never been addicted to any type of drug but I do take antidepressants.
Really excited to hear your stories and successes and together we can all get healthy.
Love and peace.