Hello all, I am pretty new still to this… 41 years old, drinking heavy for half my life. But I am looking for advise or success stories on going back to moderate drinking?
I would like to skip the binge drinking, the starting with 1 glass of wine at dinner and not ending up finishing 3 bottles that night…
As I travel a lot for business before Corona and I am also a freelance foodwriter I just adore my food and drinks. To drink Sake in Japan, ChaCha in Georgia, my peated whisky in Scotland, my Rakia in Serbia, my Vodka in Ukraine, my Grappa in Italy or my Pedro Ximinex in Portugal… these things I would miss so much !!!
But I love my early and active mornings and my sports and my sobriety…
Is there any way to mix these? Drinking once or twice a weak, and being able to stop after maximum 3 glasses? To go back to being normal as semi or full alcoholics !!! Please share…
I’ve never known a person yet to moderate I believe once a alcoholic always a alcoholic I’ve known so many people who think they can moderate there drinking and gone straight back to where they left off and worse… it’s the addict in you that’s telling you the lie of you can have just 1 drink… our disease of addiction wants to keep us sick … don’t fall for it x
Hey there. I’ve tried to moderate my drinking twice. And I failed twice. For me it didn’t work. Everyone is different but a lot of people here wil tell you it’s almost never a good idea to moderate.
Keep strong! We’re here for you!
You honestly have already answered your own Q’s. Sounds like you are already trying to moderate it and it’s not working. When you can control it did you enjoy it? And when you enjoy it, can you control it
Hiya welcome! No in my experience I don’t think it’s possible. I believe the saying a pickle can never go back to being a cucumber. The pull of booze is a hard one to stop but it is possible. You can still enjoy all of those lovely places and foods just without the booze. But that’s just my opinion 
. I wish you well my friend! 
Hallo en welkom 🙋
I do not believe in moderation. Tried it and failed multiple times. Even after a period of 5 years sober I tried and failed. The conclusion for me was I’m definitely an addict and can’t just have one.
But I’m me and you are you 
I think if you are addicted moderation is not the way. The answer of that question you can only aswer yourself.
Thanks all for these first replies, I was afraid of these answers…
I was honestly hoping it could be as with smoking for me, I can easily not smoke for a week, than smoke 5 cigarettes and put them away again… or just say I have hade enough to smoke for today…
I also do not mind not drinking for 3 or 4 days, only to wake up messed up somewhere in my home to hope not to drink for a few days again… which sometimes works… but normally just for 1 day…
We will see what happens next… 3 days sober and counting again… x
Yep, that’s the truth right there! Hope you’re keeping well Claudia?
Yes, doing ok thank you for asking. Almost 2 years sober 
And you?
Good to hear 
two years! That’s fantastic!! All well over here with my lot (thank goodness) it’s a year for me on Monday/tues 
Welcome, I am glad you are here, and hope you will stay, learn, grow, and share.
I don’t think you will find any success stories here. What you will find are lots of stories where attempting to moderate leads right back to abuse of alcohol.
I tried moderating for 25 years. Never worked. I romanticized alcohol. Had stories, talked about the local brews i tried all over the world.
I finally realized…alcohol gave me nothing, but took so much from me. When i finally realized this, my love affair with alcohol ended.
For me, looking at what 861 sober days have given me, there is nothing that drinking 1 beer a day can compare to.
@Yoda-Stevie is exactly right in my experience. I can’t tell you how many times I had a bad night or weekend where my drinking was completely out of control. I would convince myself “Okay this has to stop. From now on, I’ll just drink beer.” Or “I can’t keep getting drunk and staying drunk on all my days off, so I’m just going to drink twice a week.”
Yeah, that never works. It led to many failed promises to my wife, and almost ruined our relationship and my health.
I just posted this yesterday on a different thread somewhere here, but the best advice anyone has given me in my early sobriety was “You can’t have just one, so get that out of your head.”
I don’t do AA or anything like that and I have no experience with addiction before so it was important for me to hear that.
Welkom Kevin. In my experience, once somebody lands here, once somebody becomes aware he or she has a problem with alcohol, there is no turning back. Whatever you want to call it, it is progressive and the only cure is total abstinence. I totally recognise what you are saying about adoring the combination between drinks and food. I am pretty sure though you will be better able to taste what you are eating without being under the influence. And once I made the conscious decision not to drink any more, not drinking became much easier for me. Last couple of good restaurants I visited, I smelled the wines of my table partner. Worked well for me. I really don’t like the alcohol no more or the effect it has on me. It’s a matter of mindset. Success.
Your first sentence says it all, I think. There is life without it!
I am back after 6 months sober and a hard relapse. I had convinced myself, yet again, that I could moderate my drinking and be “normal”. I failed again miserably.
This is a popular topic here!! And welcome!! Great questions to consider. There is another recent thread you may find helpful…
My first real attempt to slow down
And also these threads may help…
How often did u try moderation before realising it wasn't working? (if that is ur situation)
Nederbelg… 12 jaar aan de juiste kant van de grens nu… nu nog die alcohol grens… 
If you’re asking yourself that question then it’s a high probability that for you, moderate drinking is probably not possible. Although I do have some military buddies that do it after they’re extreme drinking days. This is only my opinion, I don’t fear alchohol, I don’t fear anything. When I hear people say they avoid going out or even avoid going to establishments that serve alchohol on the menu, I honestly think they have a bigger problem emotionally then Alcholism. I don’t believe in preaching to people either, the fact that I became a fat binge drinking alcoholic was not alchohol’s fault, it was because I let my mind become weak. But to each their own. Could I possibly have a scotch and then walk away? Yes. But why am I drinking that scotch in the first place? To relax? To escape? To NOT feel life’s emotions or recognize it’s problems? Could you drink moderately? Yes, but moderation has blurred lines, often created by the drinker him or herself. I know “moderate” drinkers that are obviously alcoholics, but they have created their own comfort zone to make them feel better. Which moderate drinker are you likely to be? Just rambling in my head lol. Good luck.