Meatloaf made it clear that he would do anything for love, but he won’t do that.
Well what’s that one thing you won’t do for sobriety? Once your reservations are out in the open they lose power.
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I’m not sure I understand, what’s your answer? That will help give me context
For a while the one thing I wouldn’t do to get sober was follow through with outpatient treatment. I also refused to live in a halfway house/supportive living program. I would do anything for sobriety, except those things. Hell, there were a lot of things I wouldn’t do. Those were my reservations.
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I wouldn’t get sober because I had to face all my emotional problems and you wouldn’t think it from my posts on here, but I can be very cold and logical. I didn’t want to be vulnerable and I knew being sober would make me confront everything I was avoiding.
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I wasn’t willing to leave a certain toxic individual. I didn’t think I should have to. But there came a point where it was obvious I was going to die. I made a tough decision and I decided I wanted to live. AA was there to pick me up and dust me off. I’ve never looked back.
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I would not admit that I couldn’t quit if I really wanted to. I knew I drank far too much; I just lied to myself over and over again about my being dependent on it.
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Admit to family and friends that I had a problem.
Even though it was probably very apparent to my family and close friends.
I knew that once I admitted the problem to family and friends I would feel like I had to be accountable for my actions. I was so afraid to fail that I waited longer than I should have.
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It’s nice hearing from all the sober folks. I’m guessing you all ended up doing the things you said you wouldn’t, and now you are sober… Hmm.
Could it be that the things we aren’t willing to do are exactly the things we need to do to stay sober?
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Very much so, sobriety is freedom
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Admit to myself that drinking was one thing that I could not master. Drinking held mastery over me. Pride kept me drinking when I knew I had a problem and should quit. Everyone else that I knew could drink normally, and they aren’t half as self-disciplined as I am. I should be able to say “I’m going to drink one, and only one, and that is that”. But I couldn’t.
I can’t drink. That’s the bottom line. I can master sobriety. I had to accept my limitations and live within them. I may not be able to say “no” to drink number two, but I can say it to drink number one.
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Are you talking about like where you draw the line with addiction? Because there were several lines I would never cross.
- I never paid for porn. Too cheap to do something like that!
- I would never have an affair. I’m super in the closet about my addiction, and wouldnt flirt with disaster outside of it.
- Never ever watched live cams. There was something about people being actually there and not just recorded that just brought it home about what I was doing. Couldn’t face it.
Dont get me wrong, I still watched some pretty messed up S***. Just saying.
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This is really hard for me to answer. I know what the answer is but I am so resistant to it, I find I can’t even type it out. I’ve deleted it twice. Kind of an eye opener. Thanks for the post. Here goes. It has to do with fully realizing that I have three addictions, alcohol, nicotine and food, but not being willing to address the food right now in fear that I won’t be able to manage letting go of all three. So, I tell myself that I am keeping a clear mind in order to do the work to get mentally sober so that I can work on the eating disorder later. I tried including it in my sobriety and was resetting the counter every day so I gave up for now. But it really puts a damper on my sobriety as a whole and I know I have to include it and stop or I might cause an all systems melt down.
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My wife used to tell me “You have a problem” when she found my empties, or when I would be slurring at the dinner table, or when I told her I was arrested for DUI the night before, or when I couldn’t walk without falling over, or when I was so drunk I peed in the middle of my bedroom because I thought I was in the bathroom…
I heard it all the time, “Dan, you have a problem” but I never thought I did. I wouldn’t get sober because I wouldn’t admit that I had a problem and most importantly, I needed help.
Edit: I didnt mean to reply you your post, clicked the wrong arrow… oops
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Haha! No problem! Different addiction, same issue. Inability to admit I has a problem. It took a bishop from my church to tell me plainly that I had an addiction.
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I would not take an extended period of time off work (paid!) for recovery. That meant declining IOP even though I wanted it. I did evening support groups there till I dried out which did help, then “moved on.”
Few months later I was drinking more and more often. I had a free pass to get help and instead everything got slowly but surely worse.
In truth I still haven’t taken time off for recovery. Priorities are getting much clearer after a couple months of AA meetings 5 nights/week, and now looking for a retreat. I dunno what good I thought I was all scrambled like that.
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I wouldnt get sober because I was always waiting until after the next big event/party/holiday that was planned. I never wanted to miss out on anything, on having fun at parties or whatever so I had always said “Ill start after my birthday, Pearl Jam concert weekend, my fiances birthday, friends halloween parties, etc.” The problem is that the events never stop coming, theres always something else that youre invited to next… so I never got sober.
And now its time for change. Im realizing that you make your own fun, it doesnt have to revolve around drinking and drugs.
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- I wouldn’t admit that I was the problem and it was everyone else.
- I wouldn’t admit that I was an alcoholic
- I didn’t need meetings, I could do it myself.
- I didn’t think that I needed to quit work, hell I was damn good at my job, even with a hangover.?
- I would do anything for anyone but no one helps me.
So here I am, I am the problem because I’m a alcoholic binge drinker, I go to meetings, I’m now on medication, I didn’t care about myself and thats up to me, nobody else. I was good at my job that thought hasn’t changed but I had to give it up to recover from my addiction. I have done all the things I wouldn’t do
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Im glad you’ve come to that realization and that youre strong enough to follow through on it.
Ive come to that realization many times but im not always strong enough to remember that when faced with the decision. Too many times ive given in to my impulses and i go party… and for what? For that “once in a lifetime night out”? In reality the nights out are pretty much the same shit over and over again. So what the hell do i think im going to miss out on? Half the time its just my coworkers and i going out after work and bitching about our job… im not missing out on anything, yet i give in over and over again… just to wake up the next morning broke, regretful and frustrated with myself…
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Honestly I think most people avoid sobriety for this reason. Everyone has their demons and insecurities and when you’re sober you are kind of forced to face them. It can be an ugly, painful, experience but overcoming them is how we grow.
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I wouldn’t give up behaving like a rock god, not taking life seriously enough to think about the future and wouldn’t give up the invincibiltyi dont give a fuck cloak that drugs and alcohll bring. Was having too much of a good time to worry about having a better time.
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