Truth and tough love


I believe it comes from the notion of “free will”. Look, I could get up from my desk and go pour a glass of wine…if I wanted to. What stops me is the fact that I don’t want to. All the forums and meetings, and such in the world couldn’t stop me from drinking, if I wanted to drink. But I won’t drink, because I don’t drink.

I’m not willing to risk losing what I have, for the sake of some smashed grapes or malted hops. I’ve weighed the impact of alcohol on my life, and found it undesirable.

Those who say this or that is “off-the-table”, really haven’t reached the point where their will to stop drinking is greater than their desire to drink. I get not wanting to go through the pain of detoxing, but once passed, sobriety is 100% mental. Being sober is an exercise in the will.


Probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism. But God could, and would, if he were sought.

*Or whatever Tomi prays to. Death metal God or something :joy:


Is this the new public lounge now?:smile:


@aircircle I think we’re just not talking about the same “use” of the word. Or maybe you refuse to associate the word “trigger” to addiction because it may look like you don’t have control over something that “trigger” you? I don’t know, but my point was just to underline that this word is legit to use in the context of addiction too. You think that the “craving” or “getting thirsty” isn’t due to an “neuro-chemical response” ? Sorry but it is. What we control is the cognitive-behavioral pattern that follow the neurological response. So when you say that trigger is an excuse, I think you’re referring to the response you’re gonna make when confronted to the trigger.

I just wanted to point this because now every time I hear or read someone using this word I know there’s people judging them for using it, when actually it’s reasonable and real. All this said, I’m totally on your side about the control part and the making excuses part: that we have control over, and we can literally change our brain, therefore our life, by doing so.

I just wanted to make sure about what I was assuming and saying so I made a quick research on the meta-data bases, and it seems that this term is used in different type of addiction. It made me realize that the research refer usually to the “craving” or the “cues” of drug/alcool as the trigger. Maybe this is why we were confusing in our respective uses of the term.

I leave you with random citations I picked up to see the context the word is used in research.
Good day guys !

“Research asserts that environmental stress and alcohol cue exposure trigger and contribute to brain processes that may lead to relapse.” (Spencer et al., 2017)
“Drug‐reward cues trigger motivational circuitry, a response linked to drug‐seeking in animals and in humans.” (Regier et al. 2017)
“Heroin craving is a trigger for relapse and dropping out of treatment.” (Fareed et al., 2010)
“Cravings for alcohol are identified as a trigger for relapse.” (2006)
“Food addiction’ refers to the idea that certain highly palatable foods can trigger an addictive-like process in susceptible individuals” (Carter et al., 2019)


My guess: Odin, or maybe Loki.


Im guessing Loki. Pretty mischievous guy.


See this word used as a justification (i.e. excuse) for relapse on the board, and you might begin to understand why for many “trigger” = excuse.

For me, “trigger” connotes a lack of will. “I was triggered by thus and such, so I drank/used my DOC”.

A firearm has a trigger. Pull it and cycle of operation occurs that unless interrupted by malfunction, results in discharge.

A mousetrap has a trigger. When released the trap springs shut, as intended.

When someone says they were “triggered” and used, I think, bullshit. They were just looking for a reason to use.


Soooo… no more quiche? But, it was fun!

@DresdenLaPage I though that was Chad Krueger, or whatever his name is. I laughed real good at that one.



Yay! Somebody found the feve in the king cake, so we’re out of quiche, and back to the truth and tough love we all know and love, with all of its obligations and privileges.


No but here is a picture of me trying to make my point earlier.


Shouldn’t you be banging your head off that thing? :joy:


So. How bout them Yankee’s?


The weather is much more interesing…


I think it hit 80 and sunny today. A few light drizzles early on and then it cleared to beautiful blue. It’s a glorious day to be alive.

How’s it in your neck of the yinz?


What the heck, Raining here :sob: I officially hate the rain. That’s saying something.


I love the rain. I rejoice the rain. I pray for the rain. Send it west!


I assume the AZ of CaptAZ means Arizona?? I’m heading out the Friday morning. It doesn’t look like you are holding on to those 80 degree days for me. :frowning:

But no matter what it is better than the freezing temps here!!


As I was reading some of the articles I just referenced (because I obviously got caught by some very interesting facts and I had to read them), I understood we were just not talking about the same use of the word.

I understand your exemple of excuses made with “trigger”.

I am just biais by my scientific background. Because alcool cues actually “trigger” specific regions of the brain of alcoholics, that can impact on behaviors and control. This is what I am referring too. The activation of these specific regions of the brain can be reduced by, at least, two things, which are healthy coping skills and abstinence.

So obviously, the “trigger” that we feel as an addict will diminish with time and with a better setting of behaviors or lifestyle. Perhaps the early-sober people use the “trigger” excuse more often because it is actually more vivid in their cases, compared to people with more sobriety time under their belt.

So when people are using this excuse, it is legitimate to underline the fact that they have to change their lifestyle, by suggesting programs, techniques, plans, etc. Little tough love might help some. But we can’t say that triggers doesn’t exist, because they’re real and effective. It’s what we do about it. This is what we control.


So cold my phone won’t load my weather app.


I thought I had?