Ok so my last drink was 4 days ago and as the weekend approaches I’m feeling anxious and nervous about being in social situations where alcohol may be present. Can you guys give me some tips and tricks, maybe list some things that helped you in social settings. Even if noone else is drinking I feel the urge bc I’m not that social when I’m sober. Kind of a loner. Thanks in advance.
Hey I hope you get through it. I’m on day 4, again. I’m here to follow this thread. Could use some tips.
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I am right there with ya on day 4 too. Preparing for the weekend. My boyfriend still drinks and we live together also so that makes it tricky too. I’ve informed him of my plans not to drink and told him that I don’t want to be around it this weekend. I’m sure he will still drink, just not in front of me. Honestly, since this is the first weekend I may just hide out, watch netflix, and eat good food. Trying to not get over stimulated/triggered. I think laying low is key this first weekend.
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Hey! For me it was best to take temptation away. My first many weekends were spent relaxing at home and giving my body some very much needed rest. The idea of carrying on in the same places I used to drink in felt silly. I stayed home. Took lots of baths, watched movies, went to get chair massages or regular massages, spent time cooking food that I wouldn’t usually have time to cook w all my drinking, read sobriety literature, watched movies etc, took my pups on long walks in the woods. It took me a while to learn about having fun after the drink and drugs were gone, but I’m a little over two years sober now, and I’m so very happy I took the time out to get settled more in my “new weekend”. I hope this helps 
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Hi, welcome to the forum!
At the beginning, you may want to consider avoiding social situations where drinking will be a temptation, just until you get some solidity in your sobriety. There will be plenty of opportunities later on to revisit this. Social situations with drinking are among the most common causes of relapse I see people posting here, full of regret. @ELY83 made some excellent points about this and staying home.
If you do go, there are things you can do to improve your chances of success:
- Plan (possibly bring) what you will drink instead of alcoholic beverages
- Leave early to limit your exposure, your resolve is strongest at the beginning when you have the most mental stamina. Not to mention drunk people can be pretty annoying when you’re sober…
- Have your own means of transportation (car, taxi, transit, Uber) so no one can impede you leaving when you need to go
- Check in with someone before and after for accountability. Even better if you can tell people at the event you won’t be drinking.
I say staying home at this point (and perhaps planning sober social events for seeing your friends) is safer, but of course it’s your choice.
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@ifs has some great advice re alcohol. About the social side, it is just after New Years, so think of lots of questions to ask people about that.
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Hey Jeanna,
Nice to hear from you. I share your concerns about the weekend. I have just started day 5 myself today. I have a social event elsewhere on Saturday. To avoid drinking alcohol I plan to drink tonic water and diet soda. I also plan to make an escape via taxi just after midnight when the alcohol will have had its effects on others and I should be able to be home at a reasonable time.
One of the main drivers to make this work for me this weekend is reflection on my weekend last week. I never, ever want to feel that bad again - physically and psychologically.
Having said that, I am going to be optimistic and hope for a good Saturday anyway 
hope you have fun too!
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Hi everyone,
I’m halfway through day 3 and I have a function this afternoon which, working for myself, and it being January, I can’t afford to skip. There will be alcohol. That kind of scares me. They know me as the guy who drinks quite some. Will try @ifs points. Wish me luck.
All the best to all of you this weekend.
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Personally, as it’s so early I’d follow @Jen2020’s example and stay at home. Binge watch TV, go for walks, listen to music, pamper yourself.
At the end of the day the weekend is just another couple of days, nothing special.
Change your view on how you see the weekend, it certainly helped me.
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Fair play for planning on staying to midnight. I would usually plan to duck out around 8 or 9 
If it’s fun I stay later but in early sobriety I found that preparing myself to leave early made it easier. Less time to get through and less expectation to stick around.
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Copying my response from another thread because I’m lazy 
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I would also give another +1 for changing how you look at weekends. For me a big part of sobriety has been learning to spend time in my own company, to work on working out who I am and what I want rather than just going out and getting shit faced because that’s what I always did.
It’s a journey, you don’t need to figure it all out on your first weekend 
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Thank you everyone. I was planning on hanging with this guy but it’s probably best to cancel even though he doesn’t drink. Makes me nervous to think about hanging out with him without a drink. I guess last Saturday could also be a driver for me as someone stated above. I actually got so drunk that I fell out of a bar height chair and busted my knee. That’s the reason I decided that alcohol can no longer be such a big part of my life. Especially when I’m feeling down and trying to drown my sorrows which we all know doesn’t even work. I’m definitely a weekend drinker so changing my perception of weekends is a great idea. I don’t drink every weekend like I used to which is a step in the right direction. My son and I will be going to the gym tonight and probably Saturday too. I may go see my bestfriend as he is having surgery today. He’s an alcoholic but has been working on his drinking as well. I asked him to join me in my “no alcohol” challenge and he thought it sounded like a great idea especially since he’s having surgery. The thoughts of not being able to hang out with my bestie bc he drinks is beyond frightening. I have always been a bit of a drinker but when I was dating my ex it got worse. I was drinking with him everytime we hung out which was a lot. About 4 or 5 days a week. Since we broke up I’ve cut my drinking down by half or more until last week when I drank for 3 days in a row. Anyway I’m rambling.
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I can do relate to your post! We are both on Day 5 and last weekend’s disaster is enough reason alone for me not to drink this weekend. With that being said I’m planning on skipping my alcohol fueled social event tomorrow just to be safe. Don’t want my addicted mind rationalizing me into picking up again.
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I’m rooting for you that this time sticks. It’s changing old habits, for me as well.
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Without even reading the posts im pretty sure most people said don’t go out, change your routine, go to places you can’t drink, they can’t all be wrong, well done on your sober days BTW, your doing great.
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My Mrs drinks and smokes drugs in front of me, actually right beside me in bed at night. Remember their choices are not our choices, would you put your hand in a burning fire bc they did it, I don’t think so. Don’t get me wrong some days I find it a bit frustrating but at some point in our life we are going to be in a situation where our drug of choice can’t be avoided, when this time comes we will already know our strengths and be prepared for the worst case scenario. Best and worst case scenario will be the same thing, we won’t be getting a drink. 
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im quite outgoing but i do have like to always be drinking something at a get together. so i always bring seltzer water with lemon or limes. its really refreshing and you get the fizz. good luck - you can do it! x
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Weekends was definitely my time to drink, day drink at that. Anxiety got worse and worse as the weekend approached. I found that getting up and out of the house quickly worked. Staying busy will help distract you. I am now 116 days sober and still get up early and leave the house. Just to drive, window shop or fish. Best wishes 
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Update: I’m kicking this weekends ass so far. Came home yesterday, ate dinner, took a nap, went to the gym with my son last night for quite some time, and then we met up with a guy I’m talking to who was out playing pool. He wanted me to stop by for a few since I was already out. He doesn’t drink and knows where I’m at so we met across the street instead of the bar. We’ve hung out 4 times and this was the first time he has seen me sober. He said he likes sober me and that I’m quite different in a good way. I was a little nervous at first but it quickly went away and we had a nice time talking. His friend came over to say hi and asked if we wanted to go pick up a 12 pack n just hang out at his place. We both declined. I came home, watched some tv, and went to bed. My bestfriend has invited us to come over tonight and watch movies. He’s a bit of an alcoholic but he just had surgery yesterday and promised there would be no drinking. If any alcohol shows up and I feel tempted then I’ll be leaving. Not that I can’t turn alcohol down bc I’ve done it many times before but I really don’t want the temptation right now if possible. I don’t want to be rude by leaving but I have to put myself first for once. Not my strong suit. Anyways, you guys rock and I appreciate your support and advice more than you all know. Keep up the good work guys!!
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