Hi Friends,
I’m sorry about not responding to your attempts to reach out. I value this community so greatly, and also respect the forum rules - and I just wasn’t sure how to respond. I didn’t want to lie and say that I was sober and thriving, I didn’t want to be vague and inauthentic, and I didn’t want to tell the truth quite yet. I wasn’t strong enough to face it myself.
Thankfully, there’s nothing left but the truth now, and the truth is that I cannot drink. On that note, I think I’ll head on over to the check-in thread…
Thank you for reaching out, for your care and concern. It means a great deal to me.
It’s so good to see you again. What matters is that you came back–not only here but also to working on your sobriety. Some people start on that path and never falter. Some people, like me, start and stop so many times that I couldn’t give you a number, until it finally sticks. I think many here are in between the extremes, so you are sure to be welcomed back with open arms and without condemnation.
You are stronger than you think. Just remember, you haven’t failed until you quit trying; and as long as you come out of a bad or disappointing experience having learned something that can help shape you into a better person, it wasn’t a waste.
Thank you so much, Chiron. I’ve been telling myself to be grateful, even, for this mess of the last 200 days - for what I can use it for.
Thank you for your words and your kindness, the comfort and support in them.
In 2015 i went on a cruise (i had like 7 or 8 months sober) and i drank 1 beer in Mexico INSTANTLY all my brain could think about was the next beer. Now i wasn’t quitting for good when that happened, i was stopping for 1 year but failed none the less. Today I’m 2 years and 7 months sober and i sometimes forget how bad things were for me while drinking… I will never forget how my brain instantly went back into full addiction mode tho… like a light switch getting flipped. That has kept my ass from falling more than once this time around.
Moral of my response is that I’m sure there will be something you’ll never forget from your time out and I’m really glad you’re back
I’m really good, I always think of you on the 25th of every month. I can’t access your thread at the moment, but yayyyy congrats! Happy 8 months to both of us 👯♀
welcome back 
I hope to things go better
Happy 8 months to both of us 👯♀ 
