Over the past month my drinking got out of control, if I’m honest though it’s been out of control a long time. I hurt friendships, damaged my marriage, and it all culminated ina DUI last week. I almost lost my marriage and I’m still not sure if I’ve lost my career in the medical profession because of it. My husband is a professional dancer and I am with him this weekend at an event. Im surrounded by people drinking and also people mad at me for my past drinking. Dealing with all the consequences and pain from what I’ve done just makes me want to drink even more. I hope this gets easier but right now I feel alone and so angry at myself… why couldn’t I just be normal and drink in a healthy way… why did I have to self destruct like this… will things ever feel good again in my life? How do you get through the pain and discomfort without drowning it all in alcohol?
Hey there! I’ve been drifting in and out of the drinking game in the last year or so. Nothing majorly out of control but I always went back to drinking on te weekends of ‘on occasions’. Maybe like that event of your husband.
It’s just an idea but maybe you could try to go and enjoy watching your husband dance? Or if he’s not dancing try to enjoy your time with him without alcohol? Try not to pay attention to other people drinking. Your much stronger sober than under influence.
I must say I’m better at giving advice than following it.
A course of events and thoughts got me drifting back to the app and forum.
I hope I gave you some kind of strength!
Because there is no healthy way to drink something which is literally a poison. It’s true a lot of people do their thing - people who don’t have this sensitivity - but they’re not actually gaining anything by it.
You’re one of the lucky people who gets a ticket out of the expensive waste of time which is alcohol consumption. You get to have your time back, to be your full, human, present self. This is a gift.
Welcome to the club Meg 
Have a look around here and get to know some of the other members. I’m sure you’ll find you have lots in common:
Checking in daily to maintain focus #44
Foodies Unite #5 (trigger warning food) TAKE ANOTHER LITTLE PIZZA MY HEART!
Don’t give up and take it one day at a time. Keep checking in, share your fears, your feelings. You’ll get there.
let the haters hate, the main thing that’s important is that you didn’t like the person you were either and have chose to change. Do what you do and all the people you meet from this day on are going to have a different impression of you.
Most importantly though is don’t care what other people think full stop. Your going to live a very long miserable life trying to please them all.
Reaching out and admitting you might have a problem is the first scary step and you did that. If you want to live a life free from the ups and downs of alcohol you just have to start trying to do that. Read books about sobriety, talk on here with others who know what you are going through so you don’t feel so alone.
Many people stopped drinking after DUIs, I didn’t, I let 20 years of stopping and starting drinking elapse before I made my mind up to quit. It is better for me on the sober side, hard sometimes but not every day is hard like my drinking days were. Welcome. Let us know what you need. 
Thank you for putting it that way. I need to remind myself alcohol is poison for my physical and emotional health. So grateful to have found this community!
Stay sober one day at a time and all your problems your going through at the moment will work themselves out I can guarantee you that it’s a much better life sober I have lost jobs relationships crashed my car got arrested I have done it all but I’m nearly 10month sober and feeling great you can get there too 
Thank you for sharing this it is inspiring and helpful for me to have hope things will work out.