Day 453 clean and sober today. Up and drinking coffee before going to work. I was thinking about possibly dating again but it’s so weird to me right now. I wouldn’t even know how to meet someone. I feel like I’ve lost the ability to socialize because I have been in treatment and am now working with no one but guys for over a year now and I have no idea how this is supposed to work. Dating apps are dumb and awkward to me, I don’t like them one bit. Quality problems I suppose lol. Anyway, I hope everyone has a great day today, love you guys! 
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I haven’t watched or read the news for about five years. One of the best decisions I ever made. Hope you feel the benefit.
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Meditation and reading from Buddhism and other contemplative theory about the self helped me a lot discerning and increasing the gab between my ego-addict and broken self and my present and mindful self.
Breathing the cloud of confusion in and out, and letting it go. It shall pass like all emotions and desires. Focusing on compassion and kindness for people we love, then ourselves, is a good way to make room in our heads for a better states of mind and therefore better choices and acts.
There is no goal here other than being in that right moment the person you can be without reacting to every stimulus that touches you or to every emotions that arise from the mind.
There is always room to breathe.
If actions are driven by guilt then it’s the same as if it was from anger or vanity: it’s still emotionally driven and therefore reinforcing the pattern of reacting upon emotional states (which can be dangerous for substance users) instead of acting from within a calm centred mind.
If my mind is going in every direction, then I call it a day and rest.
Everyday will be a win if I choose to sit in my own shit and find a way to be cozy in there instead of relapsing and risking to kill myself.
Emotions passes, anxiety passes, but a relapses might end it all.
I Hope you’re fine and will find a way to peace.
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I feel you charlie lol 
no coffee after 3pm is the non negotiable rule so that I keep my solid beauty sleep routine tight 
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Day 9…time to go back to bed…I nearly swallowed a fly that drown itself in my freshly made coffee…I thought my puking in the morning days were behind me. Then I took a spider to the face when I walked out my door. breathes deep 
Praying these are not omens for the rest of my day LOL. 
Have a great day, folks!
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I still need to get that idea through my thick skull…
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Checking in at the end of day 248.
Sober.
Have a great sober day, wherever you are.
Goodnight. 
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Checking in.
Day 615 AF
Day 27 no extra added sugar.
I’d check in more with shit going on in my life but things are just kind of boring and mundane around here. And since I’m sober I can definitely live with that. Actually being sober makes it much easier to live like this. I use to drink when I was bored. A LOT!! Ya you can drink a lot when you’re bored right?
Keep fighting the good fight. Keep sharing. Keep supporting. And most of all keep asking for help.
Y’all are worth it.
If I continue to do what I’ve always done.
I’ll continue to get what I’ve always gotten.
Courage To Change
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Day 28/418 pills/booze
At work. Crazy pressure. Maintaining my equanimity. Love the job, hate the pressure, so am determined to do the job and let the pressure wash past me. Control the controllable, and ask for the serenity to accept what I cannot change
Have a good day all
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How is the No added sugar going? Do you feel better /different? Great done with hanging on with no adding sugar 
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Day 2 check in! Feeling good! Here’s my kitties 
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Doing well. I was hoping keeping track of what sugar I do have naturally would help me with my headaches since I cut out all extra added sugar.
But that’s not helping much. But in general I’m feeling pretty good. At least they aren’t crushing hangover headaches.
Been getting some good support on my thread and info.
Thanks for asking.
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Congrats on 2 days and your 2 precious kitties.
I love them.
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Way to go! Kimberly
One stinking day at a time.
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Second check in today. My bike ride was great, although at the beach it was crazy busy. These people, don’t they work? And if not where do they get the money to drive their cars to the beach and clog the roads there all up? Grateful for bicycle paths although they were rather crowded too.
Also grateful that this hairy flying something hit my lip and stung me there instead of flying into my mouth. Lip is swollen and it hurts a bit but it will be OK. Now waiting for the sushi delivery guy. Got a good appetite. Have as good a day or night as you can all. Love form my bike ride.
@beachmouse A bit late but I still want to answer. Because boredom and emptiness and understanding those are essential for staying sober IMO. This boredom and emptiness were always there and we drank to forget it. With differing rates of success and in the end with no success at all as it ended in total frustration, doing absolutely nothing but getting drunk. And in the back of our minds being unhappy and depressed because of that.
So now that we are sober there are two things we need to do. On the one hand we need to fill the emptiness with new things and stuff. Find useful activities to fulfil our lives. Do things that make us happy. But on the other hand we also need to learn to accept that emptiness and boredom is also part of life. That it is fine to do nothing at times. That it is good to sit with yourself and be idle. I think that that is basically what meditation is. Not that I’m a star at it. Anyway, you made me think of that. Congrats on your full month and keep going Julie. You’re doing great.
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I think its awsome how long you keept off the sugar 
About the headeachs, sure you drink enough water? Or are low in some vitamins? I had much headeachs, and my blood work showed low vit B and D. Got them up, and it helped some
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Day 31 and I’m grateful for my “third times a charm” husband who actually seems to like me. Sounds silly, but he listens to me, stops what he’s doing and engages in conversations with me, and we laugh. He says he loves me and I believe him, but liking me seems way more important. Sadly I don’t know if it was like this before when I was shades of drunk, but for today I’m grateful for a man who chooses me every day and I’m grateful that I’m sober enough to see it.
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