We are in the peak district this week, beautiful place. And yes, that is North for you!
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@geng yikes love- I am so sorry you are having trouble adjusting to your new meds and all the rest. Hope you find some normalcy soon. Sorry about the bf – sometimes our SO’s can be insensitive without realizing that they are being that way. Hoping today is a better day!
@Juli1 
I honestly don’t think we can do this alone – I rely heavily on this community and also have unbelievable family support. I do keep the 24 hour app ready to use in case I ever need to find a meeting. Can you look for another group / meeting? You may be surprised that with a different group of people you may actually find the comfort and support and no triggers. Glad to see you not quitting! Keep fighting for yourself. The more you share the less load you carry. We are all in your corner wishing you the best on your journey.
@sabrina80 this is awesome – I absolutely love this for you!
@binx Hello Double Digits! You are amazing. Hope you get those test results soon for your son. My goodness – i too am glad that you have your space back to yourself and can be comfortable being you. I don’t socialize much these days and do get anxious sometimes thinking of scenarios where I’m out with friends and not drinking and made to feel bad about it. I do hope that never happens but in reality some people do think we are boring / less fun without alcohol – FUCK IT / THEM. Glad you were able to protect your sobriety!
@mischa84 I’m sorry – that has got to be an uneasy feeling. I do hope you can take some deep breathes and are able to calm down these feelings. Sending you comfort my friend. Just saw your update – glad you are feeling better (even if it is because of the bee hive 
)
@mno WOW – love the 50 months Mno – you are killing it… thank you for being such an inspiration!
@ceeds Welcome back to the community – great job on day 2. How are you doing so far? Hope to see you checking daily.
@lola Love the 2’s! well done my friend
@mindofsobermike LOL -its going to take me a minute to get used to your new handle LOL – So happy for the new keyboard – it does make communicating here so much easier. Try rolling up a small towel to place at the edge of the board – it may help with your wrists.
@catmama23 Ah love – you have not let anyone down. You knew what to do when that voice became so loud – hopefully the next time you will reach out as soon as it starts (not allowing it to take hold). I am glad that you are giving yourself a week of selfcare / recovery time. Glad you are buckling down on the meetings and time with your sponsor. All this will be super helpful on getting you back on track – keep your love for a sober life on your mind and remind yourself that nothing good can come from drinking. Sending much love and strength my friend. I do hope the TMS treatments are helpful.
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@lablover222 Thankyou for checking in Amy – doing so great! Keep up the great work!
@butterflymoonwoman so grateful that you managed the night shift – much love lady – have a wonderful time with your selfcare and new book 
@Girlinterrupted I can’t express how beautiful your post was to read – Thank you so much for your lovely words – it brought comfort and safety into my heart. JUST THANKYOU!
@olivia Lately (like the past 4 years or so) im having a huge issue with heat… before I would bask in it and the hotter the better but now the slightest bit over 80 degrees is annoying and with humidity just forget it – Rant away – I feel your pain. I do hope you get some cooler weather heading your way.
@rob11 glad that you are still able to come here – check in and let out your frustrations – I do hope that it helps. I do hope that this facility will be beneficial to you – hang in there my friend.
@1in8billion Hey – so good to see you checking in. Finding ourselves in sobriety takes time and effort. I do know that you have so many beautiful hopes / dreams for your future and I love all that you’ve planned out. I’m sending you strength in getting through all that you are facing. Hope that you are able to have real life support in this so that you are not facing it all alone. Remember, we are always here! Always love reading your posts – keep em coming!
@mira_d hope everything goes with the child services visit today. You are doing an incredible job! I amin awe with all that you are dealing with and all the compassion that you show with your kids and here. Much strength and love my friend! LOVE that song…
@mephistopheles loved reading the post and yes – that is exactly how this recovery works- give and receive – we keep each other above water. Grateful that you could be there for this man.
Checking in on Tuesday afternoon
Not sure where the time goes – I feel like I’ve been moving none stop since I woke this morning and not really much to show for it. OK – now i’ll do my walk and stretching and try to add some productive check marks to my day. My headache is back down to a 2 so life is good. All other symptoms are manageable as well. Hoping everyone has a positively charged addiction free day – sending you all much love!
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Day 
Second Check-in
I just love how my Training Log looks. I remember I used to have like 3 Notebooks (2 of them full / 1 ongoing) all with my Running workout logs since 2012 or 2013. Detailed, with colors and a lot of information like: type of run, air temperature, clothes, heart rate, feelings on load, mileage, PR’s, goals. I loved to fill them. So now I kind of started to do it right here. My right hand is after two surgeries and half numb, so actually I have quite of a trouble drawing straight lines and my writing pattern look terrible since I only use my little finger, ring finger and thumb for most of the operations. My index finger and middle finger is almost unusable.
Back / Chest Gym workout
Leg / Arms Gym workout
Easy run 
Tempo run 
Sprint workout 
Long run
Training Log
Jul 31 - Aug 31
Weekdays
Week 1
14 km
Week 2
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Thank you Jasmine. I appreciate all of the support I have here. It’s helped me to remain on track.
My DIL is not the first toxic person I’ve dealt with and I’m sure she will not be the last. Both her and my son are actively using so reasoning with them is not possible.
Thank you again.
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@Englishd I agree with Both of You. As @Amy30 says there are not all sobriety stories are linear and all are different. It tooked some time for me to understand @Englishd a little bit, his own story helped me a bit
as he said how he always tried to look for the other guys who tend to be reliable in sobriety, not tend to fall into relapse train. I now starting to get this and this is very important and as much as I can agree with You @Amy30 - on the other hand I need to defend @Englishd for his attitude.
Some people really need to get they **sses kicked, especially for folks stubborn like me.
I think for everyone their own. As we all are different we all can find what fits for us. We are like family tho; so I guess here I need to agree with @Amy30 we also need respect each other and try not to insult one another. Maybe, sometimes when we are truly honest it is not so easy to do, and sometimes I prefer honest insult than friendly praise. I remember many times when my addict mind was trying to trick me out there was indeed a @Englishd avatar flashing in front of me like a lighthouse during stormy winter. Ok, enough praising that bastard 
there was some moments Derek insulted me (like for example criticizing some things not related to sobriety in not acceptable manner), but I forgived him.
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Thank you for sharing that Jasmine, I keep that in mind! Feeling a bit better since a few houres so I hope this time it will push trough 
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@KevinesKay congrats on 10 months 
@DanaM56 I’m sorry you’re going through this, it’s no wonder you’re feeling this way I hope somehow you will get your parents’ ashes and see your grandchildren again 
🩵
@SadMemeQueen nice tattoos 
@HoofHearted I’m sorry you’re feeling dreadful, and for the bad things happening sending strength and hope that things will get better 🩵
@BT824 congrats on your week
@JazzyS you’re right, is has been over a week now, I investigated the pain properly today and its actually my Achilles tendon that’s hurting, so I’ve changed my self-help tactics today and will see if it starts to help. May go to get it checked out on Thurs if no improvement. I hope you did manage to good a good night’s sleep last night. 
@Juli1 have you tried any of the ‘quit lit’ books? I’ve seen This Naked Mind recommended a lot here, maybe it would help. Don’t stop trying, just stay connected and try something new each time, sending strength and hope 🩵
@Kipper congrats on your week I hope the headache eased up
@Binx congrats on double digits I’m glad you’ve got your safe space back to yourself 
@Mischa84 meditation really helps me when I feel how you described, I can see how it would be difficult to get some time alone to do that though. I’m glad it passed
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@Mno congrats on 50 months
@Ceeds welcome back congrats on 2 days
@Lola congrats on all the 2s
@Cjp congrats on your vape-free week you are smashing it! 
proud of you
@Mindofsobermike you could buy a special wrist support for keyboards, lots of people had them where I used to work, it just sita in front of the keyboard, might help, especially if you’re gonna be using it a lot for college work.
@Catmama23 welcome back congrats on your honesty I’m glad you reached out and told your sponsor and that they are helping you. 🩵
@Mira_D good luck for the child services visit 
1093 days no alcohol.
558 days no cocaine.
73 days no vape.
So today I investigated my leg pain, and it’s not actually my calf that’s hurting, it’s my Achilles tendon. I’ve been looking online and it said the R.I.C.E self-help is best, so that’s what I’ve been doing today. (Rest.Ice.Compression.Elevation). I will continue with this for a few days and see how things are, really hoping it settles but the pain is bad at the moment. It’s difficult just walking a few steps to the kitchen and bathroom, and when I take my weight back off it, it starts pounding and feels like it’s going to explode.
I’ve done my usual routine things, finished the book I was reading, did my meditations, and did 42mins of colouring whilst listening to two chapters of the audiobook I’m listening to.
I’ve accepted that I can’t go for my walks at the moment, and now, I’m just really hoping my injury settles down, so I can get back out there.
🩵
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Thank you @CATMANCAM and @JazzyS I’m grateful to be sober today. I might even be grateful to be an alcoholic because it’s challenging me to be a better person and discover what it means to LIVE. Always appreciate the support on this forum and resilience that shines through each story.
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Checking in 7.8 days no vaping. Situation still sucks. Cravings are less frequent but just as strong, maybe every 1.5hrs.
It feels like im missing something. Like im forgetting something. Like my regular routine is incomplete and my ocd wants to complete the routine.
Here i sit breaking a very bad habit. Depending on you lovely strangers for community. So greatful for all of you
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U are doing SO incredibly well. I can see how hard u have been working at this and i applaud u and am cheering u on!!!
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Checking in SAF. Seemed like a quick day. Worked till around 3, took the bike out a while, and than made dinner before wife got home from work. Than just sat around reading a little bit, almost done This Naked Mind, I’ll find another one after that. Going to bed early tonight, I just feel whooped. Have a great night guys
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I can picture you posting this with a sharp dagger in one hand, a hand unicorn in another and a sharp look of malice in your eye…
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Yeah the whole ‘relapse is just an expected part of recovery’ is a bullshit lie if I ever heard one.
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Part of your regular routine is vaping. Are you mixing up your routine? Walk Boscoe at a different time of day. Eat in a different room. Sit in a different chair. Shower or bathe at a different time of day. Sleep on hubby’s side of the bed. Drive a different route to work. Fuck with that routine brain of yours for a week or so. Drink coffee with your other hand. Etc……
That helped me so much. And it was fun.
Are you sucking on a straw?
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That post could have been written by me and like me here you still are, still trying to quit… I’ll be 3 years next month ( odaat )
“Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us—sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.”
One day it will just feel different.
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“Monkeys on a boat” – seems metaphorical somehow.
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