something made me think of going the distance today
got the feels watching some Rom com with this tune playing… it’s a good song
These late nights alone, it seems that I can’t run from those things I can avoid so easily during the day.
Is this all that life has for me? Is this void inside ever going to be made whole? Can’t stand to be here, but too scared to let it go.
In the end there’s just a song
Comes crying like the night
Through all the broken dreams
And vanished years
my mom would be proud Lol she likes this song. was watching a Seinfeld episode earlier and she was a guest star so now gonna listen to…
So forgive me if sometimes I seem a little crazy
But god damn, sometimes crazy is how I feel
And my brain is starting to swirl
Down the drain of this old world
Carried over from the Friday thread. I honestly wished I could really lay out what happened today for everyone – but the fact its now tomorrow and I am sober is just kind of crazy. To give some perspective, my therapist wanted to up my sessions per week to keep a pulse on me after the last week. She said Goat — if it was anyone else, I would insist on medication as well. In sobriety, I have had to fight to learn to tell people things as they are and not compartmentalize things and present them in the way I want to be seen. I have worked very hard and have always tried to be very open with the mental health professionals.
Today is the first day where I am like – I do not want to tell my therapist what happened today.
To be baffled at someone’s actions while not be seething with anger and rage at the betrayal, manipulation, and jeopardizing my future that happened today is just a miracle. If this was four years ago, I would have found myself in the bottom of a couple handles hanging on for dear life for the next couple days. Today, I do not have to live that way… and I do not have to live this way anymore – if I don’t want to. I just need to be willing to take the next right action and let the lila take me where it may…
I guess I needed to slave all these years to learn the way to sink the ship… to learn that maybe I am worth enough to deserve something better. Maybe one day I will find the courage to believe that.
I heard a cover of this song tonight…normally not a country music fan, but the artist had a Johnny Cash flair and performed it in such a deep way. Wish I could share his version, but this one is touching just the same.
Some recent heavy hitters on the playlist
