I am so very sorry that you are struggling and are not able to figure out this site Charlene.
This site is active 247 and someone is always here to help out. If you change your mind on leaving - please reach out with whatever questions you may have.
I find that daily gratitude practice and checking in (multiple times if needed) are helpful for my sobriety.
Checking in daily to maintain focus #58
Daily Gratitude, The Air Of Recovery #5
Gratitude List. 5 things daily
Also a few threads below that might be helpful to you love:
Frequently asked questions about sobriety for newcomers
I do hope that you find some comfort and help with your journey even if it is not with us.
So sorry for your depression and that the therapists have not been able to help you. Have any of them tried EMDR therapy? I do wish you loads of love 