How are you all navigating recovery at this time

I am brand new to the forum. I had never really considered seeking out an online support forum for addicts but I am attempting to abstain from alcohol for the first time in 12 years long term. I have successfully avoided drinking for 6 months. I downloaded the sobriety tracker app on the suggestion of my one sober buddy and saw the forum, so here I am. I have been pretty dissatisfied with most recovery groups I have attended and with the social distancing I have gone into full isolation mode. I am wondering how you all have hope daily?

I have intense social and general anxiety and thanks to my good friend PAWS it has been extra great this week. I feel lost, without direction or guidance. What things give you comfort? How do you find a way to battle the worst parts of yourself day after day tirelessly? I feel doomed to repeat my cycle until it kills me.

This latest attempt at recovery has been a first for me. All other attempts were quarter-hearted and done primarily on the behest of others. I am no longer under a court order to attend substance abuse treatment. Probation is terminated. But all of 2019 was a firestorm of my selfishness and destruction. I have no idea how I completed probation successfully without new charges.

I did not intend for this to become such a long rant but I feel like I need some inspiration, otherwise I am forever doomed to failure. I grew up in a very tightly controlled religious family. I have been having a lot of trouble even praying. Any and all advice, suggestions, and encouragement are greatly appreciated. I wish the very best to all of you fine people. Here’s to one more day of recovery!

4 Likes

Hi there and welcome!! :heart: One of the things I found really helpful when I first joined this forum, was reading a lot of threads. This particular link will take you to various threads you may find of interest…

Hello and welcome, I grew up under similar conditions and it still makes me feel bad from time to time. But I’ve got an incredible support in here, the daily check in thread is a huge help in keeping it up,and staying sober. Even if I’m isolated I know there’s a lot of people in here fighting to change their lifes and doing the same things as I’m trying to do.

Reading posts can be a huge help for tips in how to handle the situation as well.

I wish you all good and the best of luck with your sobriety.

Welcome C
Lately I been walking a lot with my music plugged in. The last 3 days I been listening to John McAndrew. He kind of does recovery music. I don’t know what you call it. At times he makes me cry. Especially when his song tells me “I’m good enough and God loves me the way I am”. Sometimes I plug in my gangsta rap and angrily walk my ass off in the neighborhood being pissed off cuz I can’t drink like a Normie. Sometimes Christian music. I’m a recovering catholic, still a proud Christian but struggling a bit with God these days. But I know he’s with me and helping me.

I enjoy the gratitude list on here. Never miss a day of gratitude. I’m grateful to be sober today. And for all Gods blessings.
:pray::heart:

I’ll have to check him out. Have you heard of Benjamin Tod or lost dog street band? He writes a lot about recovery as well. I actually discovered a song by him about relapse and that was my jam until I got sober and started listening to the rest of his stuff. I appreciate you acknowledging anger about no longer being able to justify drinking to ourselves is a thing. I appreciate the suggestions I may have to try a few.

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Ooh thanks. I’ll check him out. I am hoping to find someone else who sings songs about recovery. I don’t know what to call it. I like John McAndrews first 2 albums best. I download on iTunes. Are better than the 3rd one I just downloaded :grimacing:. Maybe I’ll give it another chance. He’s got quite a recovery story. Don’t we all? I met him at my kids rehab a while back. He travels to rehabs to inspire people. Well he sure inspired me.
:pray::heart:

I already posted this earlier today and not sure how to tag it in on this but…

Sometimes I stumble. Sometimes I fall
Sometimes headfirst into the wall
Sometimes I want to scream about it all
Sometimes I stumble. Sometimes I fall

Heard an angle whisper in my ear
He said now don’t you worry about it all
Heard an angle whisper in my ear
He said your good enough anyhow
Then I heard the angle laugh a little right out loud
He said. You will always stumble and you will always fall

Sometimes I really need that little angle whispering in my ear :kissing_heart: