I’m checking in, day 117. I’ve not been craving as much. It’s hard for the addict inside me to let go of this fantasy world. But it’s still a fantasy. And embracing reality is where I’m going to find the best happiness, joy, and serenity.
I feel more hopeful and strengthened each day. I’m still very vigilant, but this year is coming along amazingly. I really appreciate God bringing TS into my life. This is changing my life. And though I’m temporarily without church and CR, I have many other tools in place to succeed.
I’m still powerless and weak. But I’m more heavily armed and protected now. I’m not going down again easily.
Thanks for the encouraging nice reply. My clumsy cat smashed my wine glass off the coffee table 2 nights ago and it shattered. . No big deal since it had sparkling water in it. Is that a sign too? I don’t know when I can get my grown up family of eight together again with all their schedules for another vacation. But one of these days I’m getting to the Netherlands and going to see all the tulips and flowers in all your gardens. It’s truly unbelievable how the whole world is being effected by CV. Stay safe.
Day 199
I’m still sober and that’s great. Now if I could just get myself a dose of motivation and self discipline to go along with the sobriety and quarantine that would be great. I find myself avoiding thinking about the hard things because it’s all I can do just to stay sane and sober each day. I don’t have the emotional bandwidth to work on any of my steps right now. I’m thankful I have a job. I’m thankful my family is healthy. I’m thankful I am sober. I’m trying to focus on gratitude today and will force myself to do things I don’t “feel” like doing otherwise the depression will be winning. Congrats to all of you soldiers who are pressing on right now. Keep checking in. It helps me to read your stories and I’m sure I’m not the only one.
Oohhh…nice number!! I say be gentle with yourself and don’t expect more than you have to give. You are okay right where you are at right now. That is good. Know that you are not alone in being unsettled.
I got some tips if your interested. I smoked many years ago and my boss paid for us to do a stop smoking clinic. It worked. I didn’t just quit smoking. I STOPPED smoking.
Anyway. The things that worked best for me were.
First 2 weeks.
No booze. U should have that down already I hope.
No sugar
No caffeine
These things are all triggers.
Drink lots of water. Seriously drink water like you’ve never drank it before. Helps flush out the nicotine.
I got some worry beads to keep my hands busy.
Get a straw. Keep it in your mouth and suck in fresh air. I remember waiting tables and I always had a straw in my mouth for about a month. Even taking orders. It was definitely a conversation piece. I found the big fat McDonalds straws work the best. Cut them in half.
Drink lots of water.
The most fun or interesting part was mess up your brain. Smoking is a habit right. Start messing up all your habits.
Sleep on the other side of the bed.
Drive to work a different route
Use your spouses car if u can.
Sit in a different spot for dinner.
Shower in the evening if u usually shower in the am.
You get the idea.
Did I say drink lots of water?
Good luck. I didn’t think this was going to be this long. But it worked for me. Maybe because my wife and I were planning on starting a family back then and I didn’t think I’d be a good example being a father with a butt in his mouth. But I had tried before and nothing worked until I had all these tools to help me.
Good luck. God bless.
Ooooh, my feet are happy dancing for tomorrow’s number
I too have no motivation or self discipline. I haven’t had either since I stopped drinking. At 158 days AF, I would have thought I would be in a better place by now
So, I started my sober journey this year. At first I thought I was just going to quit drinking as usual. Then I checked out this app. I was planning to relapse or drink on my 60th birthday and for my vacation to The Netherlands. I told everyone on here I was planning a relapse for my birthday and y’all talked me out of it. I didn’t want to tell you all about the vacation because I planned on drinking for the Atlantic crossing and on the barge in Holland. Now I don’t have to. Thank you CV And yes it was very conflicting thinking on my part. After I made it through my 60th birthday without a wonderful Cabernet and a few martinis I felt pretty proud of myself and grateful for all the support on here. And then I decided to take my soberity one day at a time and not think about the upcoming trip. I can’t go on the trip. And I’m not drinking. And I don’t feel like drinking now and boy now could be a great excuse to drink couldn’t it? I’m learning a drink can’t change a darn thing. Except make me feel bad about my decision to drink and beat myself up. At day 87 and Happy to not be starting over
Ohh i missunderstood i thought you had relapsed. So good to hear that you stay strong. I can only imagine all the conflicting thoughts. I have them now and then.
Day 27. I must have inadvertently put my grumpy pants on this morning. Strange, it’s the same pair of sweatpants I had on yesterday.
I managed to do the prep work and get a pot roast in the crockpot and only have a minor disagreement with my husband. I didn’t slam the cupboards but I let them close loudly. Our disagreements are usually the deadly silent and passive aggressive kind. I thought about wine and how much I enjoy it, and how much I let it destroy me a month ago. My husband is brewing another batch of beer. I am working on feelings of resentment and looking for some peace. We hugged and resolved our grumpiness toward each other and talked about how the stress of the world is getting to us. I’m going to read a book and get lost in a plot, listen to the howling wind and maybe take a nap. Grump rant over.
. No big deal since it had sparkling water in it. Is that a sign too? I don’t know when I can get my grown up family of eight together again with all their schedules for another vacation.
But one of these days I’m getting to the Netherlands and going to see all the tulips and flowers in all your gardens. It’s truly unbelievable how the whole world is being effected by CV. Stay safe.
And yes it was very conflicting thinking on my part. After I made it through my 60th birthday without a wonderful Cabernet and a few martinis I felt pretty proud of myself and grateful for all the support on here. And then I decided to take my soberity one day at a time and not think about the upcoming trip. I can’t go on the trip. And I’m not drinking. And I don’t feel like drinking now and boy now could be a great excuse to drink couldn’t it? I’m learning a drink can’t change a darn thing. Except make me feel bad about my decision to drink and beat myself up. At day 87 and Happy to not be starting over
