Lost & lonely

Heartbroken. Painful breakup. Feeling lost & hopeless. 24 days sober. Im all alone for the 1st time in my life. I need friends in Aurora, CO :pensive:

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Oh, Joel, I am so sorry you are in pain. Break ups are always so difficult, even when necessary.

This is a great opportunity to be WITH yourself, and remember who you are; if you can’t remember, who you were before these relationships l, then you get to choose who you want to be in this new stage in your life.

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Sorry you’re feeling low Joel. You are not alone. Welcome to this community and congratulations on 24 days sober. That’s great. Perhaps you can look for AA meetings to attend in your area. Alone doesn’t have to mean lonely. Maybe this is an opportunity to get to know yourself. Please remember to be kind and gentle with yourself. Wish you all the best and again welcome.

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Hey Joel! Break ups are horrible. I’m glad you are sober. I’ve had some very rough days in sobriety, am grateful that I have sober friends and my AA community to lean into. What are you doing to support your sobriety?

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Nothing in particular. Trying to keep busy and keep my mind off her

I’m not really sure if I ever knew who I was. And I’m not really able to pinpoint a person I want to be right now

Thank you, maybe I will. Being alone 24/7- 7 days a week is not doing me any good

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You can go to a zoom meeting; you can keep camera and mike off and just listen.
I’m sorry you’re hurting.

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I’m not sure how to do that

Hey, don’t worry about that. You already are someone. And you will feel like that more and more over time. Like yourself. If you stay sober and try and look after yourself during this hard and painful time, you will come out the other end. It won’t always hurt like it does now. That’s the best I got. I can relate with you v much atm. Sadly.

Sending a big fat hug your way.

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You download the zoom app to your phone. Then this is the code:
24 hrs AA zoom meeting - #2 by Dolse71

There is also the app In the rooms or the website intherooms.com where you can find meetings around the clock and around the world.
Have you tried real life meetings? They’d help with loneliness too.

More resources here: Resources for our recovery

Also this place is great. You’re never alone on here. You’re new so imma give you the intro. Best places to be are

Checking in daily to maintain focus #50

Daily Gratitude, The Air Of Recovery #2

Post photos of your pets #5

Mental health memes and discussion (Part 2)

Show me your transformations!

@Jobel66 welcome here and you can do this thing. I know cos I’m doing it and sometimes I don’t know how the f I am but here we are. :boom::cloud_with_rain:

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You’d have to download the zoom app, I think from there it’s easy. I did it a long time ago when they have zoom meetings here but I forget the steps.:hugs:
@Lisa07 can you tell him more?

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It’s good of you to provide these resources. I’m grateful to be part of this community that is always supportive. Nicely done @Faugxh

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@Jobel66 …To attend zoom meetings from your phone, just download the zoom app. Then enter the meeting ID and password if needed.

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Hi there @Jobel66 just checking in with you. How you doing buddy?

Im hanging in there, thank you. I have lots of bouts of sadness still as I miss her, but little by little it’s coming undone

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ARRGGGHH… this sadness is overwhelming me…:pensive::cold_sweat::sob:

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I am sorry to read that. that sadness is … phew. it tells you that you have truly loved, is the best I can tell myself. that you did not waste your time. that you live your life worthily, forging those deep attachments, going for the real stuff, giving your best, tenderest bits, your vulnerable heart. which is why now it feels like you being butchered. I went through this myself recently. I had a 15 year relationship end with a man I loved like that too.

love will come to us again. I am sure.

hey, how is your sobriety doing my friend?

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I hope it’s not wrong to say that that part is easy.
I have 28 days since I quit and I haven’t had one craving. It’s the sorrow and obsessing that is killing me… :pensive:

Thank you so much for describing love like that. It’s true I would have done anything for this woman

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I don’t think it is wrong at all. it is often in life we get something horrible and something good at the same time. you have a broken heart, but no cravings. other people have different journeys…
I was blessed with a relatively shock-free sobriety journey aswell, hardly any cravings. I also really commited to it tho, was vigilant.

I hope you can find some small comfort in small things for now. do you have a pet? I have two dogs that I love a lot. maybe some work or a hobby you can rely on now to take your mind of things for a while? a friend to talk to?
make sure you eat. sleep and rest. keep your house in some kind of order. if these basic things fall too far into neglect, it can make everything else even harder and can also become a threat to your young sobriety.

I’m here every day, if you wanna check in. I’m always happy to read from you.