As I transition from one recovery program to Recovery Dharma, I want a space to log my journey as I explore new things.
I decided to walk a new recovery program in order not to stagnate in my recovery. I had a stereotypical view of something based in Buddhist teachings. I want push myself, because that is how I grow.
This will just be a boring thread of my learnings from a new path.
I havent read much, but so much as stood out. This is my learning for the day
Recovery Dharma -
“Compassion is not just offering sympathy and a helping hand. It’s also an intention to avoid causing harm to others and ourselves”
Compassion seems so simple, it’s the second sentence that will be my focus for thought tonight.
Recovery Dharma -
“Sangha(community), in a very broad sense, means being willing to let other people in, to let them matter.”
All people matter, all people need community. If they matter, I must be mindful of their life, their backgrounds, what is important to them. Their unique differences from me, make the community better.
I’m joining you on this if you don’t mind. Gonna try to find an online meeting this week. I’ve read some of the book and have it downloaded. Been reading this as well. . .
Feel free! I would love your insight
by Recovery Dharma -
“Our trauma is not our fault, but healing from it is our responsibility, and our right.”
From recovery Dharma
“Our refusal to accept the way things are leads to wanting, or craving, which is the cause of suffering. We don’t suffer because of the way things are, but because we want—or think we “need”—those things to be different.”
Even with 4 years of sober time, this is something I need to remind myself. My refusal might not lead me to drink today…however: 1) wont make me happy today, 2) could slowly snowball, day after day…and get me right back where I started in 2018.
From Recovery Dharma
“Conditions or circumstances in and of themselves don’t cause suffering. They can cause pain or unpleasant experiences, but we add suffering on top of this when we think we “need” those circumstances to be different.”
At face value, on the outside I can let bad things go. While, I know bad things happen in life, and I can move on along and make due with circumstances…I latch on to them, suppressing my mood…acting as if I am ok. I cause suffering to myself by not letting go absolutely.
For example, if a worker pisses me off, I will deal with it, retrain if need be…ect
But it’s in the back of my mind all day long. Even after I have dealt with it.
I totally get this. In my case though I tend more commonly to be pissed off at myself for whatever it is (not other people); but it’s the same thing I figure.
One of the things I love about Buddhism is the idea of equanimity in seeing and integrating suffering. Suffering is here, it is one part of life; not being perfect is one part of life; being in progress and ever changing is one part of life. There’s so much richness in that.
I think this pulls us to explore acceptance more. For me I am working to be more accepting. I’m not sure what that will mean exactly but I’m still here so that must be good
I need to find a way to let it go, inwardly. If that makes sense. It doesnt ruin my day, per say…I can adapt and over come. I think my measurement has been, “a shitty day didnt make me drink, I survived and thrived.” All that is good, but I still latch on to it somewhere in the nether regions of my old brain.
Now, with progress…it use to consume me, attitude and all…now it doesnt.
Learning to observe our emotions, allow them in, and allow them out, is definitely a process. We all get stuck in our reactions at times, fixated on the ‘this is bad’ feeling.
I return often to ‘let go, or be dragged.’ It serves the purpose of reminding ourselves that emotions come and go…it is our attachment to them that brings us suffering.
You have told me to let go or be dragged a few times “way back when”. I have come a long way…still got room for improvement.
I’m pretty sure that’s the Fifth Noble Truth right there
Letting go is definitely an art.
Yup…it is. On my second reading of the book. Each time I get something more out of it.
Progress, not perfection my friend!
This really stood out to me tonight, thanks for sharing this! That really is the root of all suffering.
Love these quotes. Acceptance for me has been key. Not only with alcohol, but challenging situations in life in general. It’s so much easier when you accept and let go of what you can’t control. Also, knowing you are not alone in your suffering.
Feel free to add, we learn and grow together!
Reading a page on “break” at work.
Some times the universe knows what I need to read. Even for the little things.
From Recovey Dharma
"There may be times when we don’t necessarily want to act in a wholesome manner. We may know what’s the right thing to do, but just don’t want to do it. It’s in these moments when we can focus on our intention. Maybe we aren’t ready to do the difficult thing, to quit a certain behavior, to set a boundary, or forgive someone for whom we hold a resentment. But we can set the intention to do so, and investigate our willingness in meditation by repeating statements like “May I have the willingness to forgive…. May I have the willingness to quit smoking (or skip that piece of cake, or stay off the internet tonight, etc.)…. May I have the willingness to make amends to my partner.”
Do I know this? Yes! Did I need to hear it in another way? Most certainly!
From Recovery Dharma
“Generosity comes from the awareness that we’re holding on too tightly to our selfishness in a given moment.”
That is a new level of generosity for me. It’s more that giving 5 bucks, a lunch…or a helping hand…its a thought process that encompasses everything.