Hello. I am an alcoholic and have been for the better part of 20 years. I am a functioning alcoholic…except for when I am not. I can go days without drinking but when I start drinking I cant stop.
Saturday night I had a few drinks (my husband and I have been being"good" these past few weeks) and when my husband fell asleep, I left and went to the bar. The bartender called him to pick me up (thank God) and when we got home I became combative. I fell in our garage and hit my head on the concrete, knocking myself unconscious. I began to vomit and there was foam coming out my nose. My husband said I was unresponsive and called 911. I came to briefly when I was being discharged from the hospital. My husband showered with me and washed the vomit out of my hair, dried me off amd then dressed me. I dont remember any of this. There is almost 12 hrs that I cany remember.
This is not the first time, however, this was the worst time. I believe I have a slight concussion fro. Banging my head. My body is sore and I don’t know why. I am embarrassed for myself, for my husband to have seen me like that. Im ashamed of my behavior and I’m scared. Scared my husband will leave me, scared of what my life will be like without drinking. And while I’m scared, I know I need help. I am sick. I am an alcoholic.
Any advice, suggestions, tips…all would be welcome.
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Welcome, this is a great first step!
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Welcome to TS! That is one hell of a story.
You’ve definitely taken the first step by figuring out that you have a problem. Finding this forum is a great start too, there are a ton of amazing people and a lot of advice already here that you can search for if you don’t feel like waiting for a response.
I was also terrified of what life would be like without alcohol. I can very much relate to the analogy of some people viewing sobriety as losing a close friend (alcohol) at first.
Once you stop drinking you will see that life is actually far, far better without alcohol. I promise you this. It is much easier to deal with life, it just takes a little getting used too.
I hope you feel better from the fall and I hope you stick around. Start with today as day one and take it one sober day at a time; they will add up before you know it.
Here’s another thread with a ton of useful info:
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Thank you so much for the info. I have found several AA meetings neare and plan on attending one tomorrow evening. Is sobriety possible without rehab?
It is, but there is nothing wrong with rehab either.
You mentioned being scared of what your life would be like without alcohol. I used to wonder about that and worry about that and yes, I was scared of the prospect too. I can tell you that it’s a lot better. You’ve made a really important first step in coming here. Keep coming back.
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Welcome and hugs! We have definitely all been there and have similar stories. There’s a lot of help in the world for addictions now. Sending good vibes for you to find what will work for you.
Come back and tell us how the AA meeting was after you go.
Take care!
Xoxoxo
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1st AA meeting in the books and earned my 24 hour coin! It was an incredibly welcoming group and I felt very comfortable sharing. There was no judgement, pressure or shaming. Lots of praise, guidance and helpful suggestions. One of the ladies bought me The Big Book as a gift…so thoughtful! Signing off to do some reading in that BB. Prayers and blessings for you all.
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Hello everyone! Just wanted to say thank you again for the positivity. I am 17 days sober!!! I have good days and bad days amd a LOT of sleepless nights. Its getting better gradually. Taking every day as it comes!
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I missed ur original post, but well done on ur progress! U must be feeling tons better!
