I am new to this app, but I figured I would introduce myself and tell you a bit about my story. Here we go:
My name is Ray, and I’m an alcoholic. In 2018, I was hospitalized for excessive drinking (everyday) for almost 4 years straight. My organs were shutting down and it was not looking good. From there, I decided to make the decision to get and stay sober. Easier said then done, am I right? So I went cold for 4 years straight, then, I just fell off again. No idea how or why, but that’s just the way the brain of an alcoholic works sometimes. Little triggers can have the biggest impact.
So here we are in October of 2025, and I decided to get some help. Went to rehab after my body began to give out again. Made it out of there and went about 2 months without a drink. You can guess what happened next.
March 5th was my official last drink, but I could March 10th, 2026 as the start of my sobriety. That is the day I started to turn yellow again and realized I can’t keep lying to my wife, family, friends, and most importantly, myself. “This will kill you” is all that kept playing in my head. I’ve heard it from so many people, and never listened. Guess what, it is time to face the truth and start listening.
So, glad to be here with you all, and looking forward to connecting and making useful connections on this app!!!
Glad you’re here Ray! This is a great place to find support and resources to help live a sober life and combat addiction!
Sorry to hear about your struggles recently, but I’m also glad to hear you have a few days sober. I too had a long period of sobriety recently, but wound up back at the bottom of a bottle thanks to a lack of communication with a supportive community, complacency, convincing myself “it would be different this time”, and a bad case of the “fuck-it” mindset. I had an opportunity to analyze the moment I slipped during an intensive out-patient rehabilitation program and it was incredibly helpful for me to know what and why it happened, my thought process, and how I can respond differently next time.
I would challenge you to reanalyze this. You say you don’t know how or why, but then mention little triggers. Maybe do some digging and try to remember what happened that triggered you and what your mindset was like at the time. Identifying these things and learning how to cope with them or avoid them could help you avoid a relapse in the future. Saying “that’s just the way the alcoholic brain works sometimes” isn’t enough.
Like I said before, I’m glad you’re here, that you are sharing your struggles, and that you are looking for a community for support. These are all steps in the right direction! There are plenty of people here who are willing to listen and provide their experiences on a number of things, so please don’t hesitate to reach out!
I had a stroke and heart attack. After I got out of the hospital I had a cigarette. The thing that gave me a stroke and heart attack in my 30s! Death and destroying my body wasn’t enough.
What was?
Having another chance.
Tests show that the stroke didn’t damage anything, like it didn’t happen; and, my heart is fine. It’s recovered nicely. The nodule in my lung has also not grown.
I didn’t want to take such a priceless gift for granted anymore.
Sometimes we damage ourselves and the thought of dying isn’t enough, sometimes it’s what we want!
Find a therapist and an AA meeting and start to explore what’s at the core of your addiction. It’s one day, one step at a time.
THANK YOU! I’m feeling awesome! I always do when I stop for a week or two, but this needs to be my final stop. I am tired of waking up feeling and looking terrible.
Thank you! Glad you are doing better! There is no second chances when it comes to certain things, and I applaud your strength!
I have been going to AA and looking for more weekly meetings. I am keeping busy, though. Bought about $1k worth of legos (love Legos) haha. So that is keeping my mind from wondering.
Hi Ray im Ray from Scotland welcome , i went to AA and i still attend Meetings mostly doing top tables in my early sobriety i joined a gym and did alot of walking keeping fit changed my diet got a sponsor no internet when i got sober wish you well
welcome , i went to AA and i still attend Meetings mostly doing top tables in my early sobriety i joined a gym and did alot of walking keeping fit changed my diet got a sponsor no internet when i got sober wish you well