It’s been a wet and windy day here today. I hadn’t much planned so I wrote myself a ‘to do’ list last night and have kept busy ticking things off throughtout the day. I knew otherwise fuckface (a little pet name I’ve given to my alcohol voice) would start with his stupid suggestions. I’ve just finished a proper movie night with my daughter, popcorn, duvet and snuggled on the sofa 
It’s my wedding anniversary tomorrow, I know we’re going out for a meal but I’m going to be the designated driver so I wont drink. Hopefully they’ll have some nice mocktails where we’re going🍹
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Welcome to TS D.
I seen you around the last couple of days.
I’m glad you found us. Just found your thread.
I can totally relate to your earlier days of partying and chasing that next high and or next drug. Never enough to satisfy “that fuck face.” 
This is a great place to get and give support. It’s how I stay clean and sober, even though my wife drinks.
Gratitude has been my strongest tool in my toolbox. It’s how I start everday.
Being on here posting gratitude or looking at memes or posting my feelings and sharing my load with everyone has helped me so much.
We got your back if your willing to let us.
I hope to see you around.
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I love a good to do list! Feels great crossing things off.
I hope you have a wonderful time at dinner. And Happy Anniversary 
That monster inside your head, fuckface, will get quieter and quieter. I put mine in prison. Hopefully for life this time.
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Hi fellow memer 
Thank you for the welcome and the link to the gratitude thread, I’ll be checking in there for sure!
I can already tell this community is going to be so amazing in helping me to keep fighting the good fight. It’s always good to have a whole team in your corner, rather than going it solo.
See you around
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Day 8 for me today. Its been a good day. I was able to help my husband with building work on the outside of our house for most of the day (in the rain) and cooked a good meal for us all which we ate together.
I’ve not had any urges to drink, but I am going on holiday soon and I know there will be temptations then for sure. I need to be really mindful, plan ahead and try to remember some of our previous holidays where I’ve got drunk and it’s not been fun…That’s the reality I would face, not the rose tinted version of ‘carefree holiday drinks’ that fuckface will try to peddle to me. I’ll be checking in here lots on holiday to keep me focused.
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Congratulations and welcome to a great place!
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Thank you
Just checking in on day 9. I’ve felt quite grumpy and out of sorts this afternoon and evening. I don’t know why as I’ve had a good and productive day with no real issues. I just can’t seem to raise a smile. I’m hoping I’ll wake up in a better frame of mind. At least I won’t be hungover in the morning. I just have to learn to feel all the feels I guess. ODAAT
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Double digits today!!! 10 days has gone by quick.
I’ve felt really sad, vacant and short tempered again today. I am very tired as I’ve not been sleeping well at all. Fingers crossed for a decent nights slerp tonight 
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Congrats on your ten days D
I’m glad your here.
I hope you sleep well too.
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Thank you so much. Your support means a lot!
Day 13 now…unlucky for some but not me-I feel blessed
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I am feeling good today. I’ve had a really busy and social few days so I took today to have some alone time and get myself out in nature on a solo hike. It was restorative and my soul feels nourished.
I have been happy to find two great links whilst looking through posts today, one for the ‘insight timer’ app and one for ‘in the rooms’. I have used both already, to access a meditation session (something I am very new to) and to access an online AA meeting (again, something I’ve never done before).
The meeting topic was ‘progress not perfection’ and it seemed an apt topic for me today; I feel like I am making good steps of progress on this recovery journey and am also recognising that I don’t have to strive for perfection, but rather just a little better each day, with what I am able to give each day. Food for though as I drift off into a (hopefully) good night’s sleep.
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Insight Timer has been a life saver for me.
And there’s a few of us like this thread.
There’s a little challenge @Its_me_Stella started at the beginning a few of us did. Like many things. Start slow work your way up.
I do prefer guided meditations and there’s so many to choose from.
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Thank you for another great thread link 
I do find it very hard to meditate, so I think the guided meditations will work well for me 
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I hear this all the time. And I was one of those too. And I felt like I was “doing it wrong” 
.
I’ve read, a good way to start is to find some short ones you like. Start with 1 or 2 or 3 minutes a day. See what happens.
After years of doing it. My mind still wanders. And when it does, and it will. I just get back to my breathing. And I’m not beating myself up about anymore. And sometimes I fall asleep. And that’s ok too.
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Your hike and your day sound lovely!
You might also like this thread:
I attend Recovery Dharma meetings online, and each meeting has a guided meditation portion. I find the guided meditations really helpful! There are also plenty of folks in the meetings who use 12-step programs and talk about how the two fit together.
I think it’s Day 14 for you now? 2 weeks? Congrats! 
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Great advice, it’s good to hear it should get easier with time. It seems I should apply the progress, not perfection idea to meditation too! Thank you
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Thank you so much for the topic link and the link to Dharma Recovery I’ve just looked at both and they seem to be exactly the kind of thing I’m looking for to help me on this journey
I’m going to start reading the book and newbie information and also look for a meeting today.
And yes, I got two weeks yesterday…Each and every day of those two weeks I’ve been thankful I found this community 
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I’ve just woken up after the most vivid, intense and scary dream involving my abusive ex partner. I know I need to in order to heal and move forward. It is going to hurt though.
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Oh friend! First, big hugs to you. Glad you came here to get it out. Drinking and using dreams are awful, but not uncommon. (There should be some threads on those.)
I know well about the pain of facing my past actions. Everything in me screamed to avoid it. But, we’re here because we know that no matter how hard we tried to avoid the hard stuff of life (by drinking, using, numbing, etc) it still showed up. And then I went even deeper into addiction to avoid the shame of my addiction. Crazy, hey?
But, here we are. Now. Sober and recovering. It’s not always easy, no. But it is better. We may still have an aversion to pain, sure, but we learn a new way to deal with it.
I take comfort in these words from Recovery Dharma (p.2):
“Maybe it feels impossible to have faith in this part of you, to believe that you have the potential to be someone capable of wisdom and kindness and ethical deeds, to believe you can be the source of your own healing and awakening. But, don’t worry. Recovery doesn’t happen all at once. The path is a lifetime of individual steps.”
You have everything you need inside of you (and here) to take just the next step, just the next breath. Try not to think of the pain as a mountain you must climb all at once. Nope. Just a step, and a breath.
Also? About your past? I believe you were doing the best you knew how at that time. And I was too. We just know there’s a better way now. And we can set down the shame a step and breath (and the occasional sob) at a time too.
I believe in you. And I’m grateful you’re here. 
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