I am new here and this is the first time I have ever decided to join an AA group and officially become sober. Throughout my entire life I have struggled gravely with moderation in alcohol consumption. When I get drunk it’s like a different person takes over my body and bad things happen. Since the age of 11 or maybe 12 I’d had my first sip of alcohol and realized how good and funny it made me feel and as I got older I used it to have confidence and to take away both my depression and social anxiety but later on around 22 years of age, I realized it worsened all of my conditions.
At 16 the most significant situation that happened that showed me how bad I was, was when I’d gotten drunk at a mall and was almost arrested. I was placed in an ambulance and had to be sent to the hospital for the alcohol poisoning. All through my highschool years, I’d constantly bring vodka in a water bottle because it was clear and no one would notice. I got caught by security and was suspended for a week from school because I was an honor student. I would even drink alcohol at work and a manager caught wind of someone bringing alcohol to the job but I guess they didn’t name me and said its against policy for anyone to be drinking in the work place and if they are caught they’ll be fired, so I stopped. I can name so many times where things went left from my drinking from getting into a physical fight with a close friend, that I have not spoken too since last year to embarrassing myself on thanksgiving when I was 19 for getting drunk with a friend I went to school with and getting completely naked in front of everyone. I was kicked out of 3 different peoples homes because of my crazy behavior and one of them wanted my friend to abandon me on the street in the middle of the night, in the middle of the city and I am not from around there so that was extremely dangerous. Thank god my friend was a great friend and took me home.
When I get drunk I lash out and get angry and say things I do not mean. I just have no filter and often have to apologize later. At this point, its like how many times can people accept apologies from my behavior. I have tried to be sober more than once and have gone without drinking for almost a year. This year was supposed to be a new one and I was 3 months sober and got drunk with someone I had an interest in. That was the biggest mistake of my life because I got so drunk that I went to the bathroom outside of his and in one of his cups and I told him certain things about his family he did not like. I apologized to him and he is stating he needs time away from me and contemplating never speaking to me again.
Right now, I am 29 years of age and I want to get completely sober because drinking does nothing but ruin relationships and opportunities for me. Today I want to become a sober person. Today I have joined this group to hold me accountable, to no longer make those mistakes. I have a lot of goals I want to accomplish and I also want to make some good friendships on here. I believe this will be a good community for me.
With this post, I hope I did not trigger anyone and hope that we can all help each other grow. It’s always good to have a family you can go down this healing recovery journey with.
Thank you to anyone who reads this post and I hope you have a great day and know that you are a good person and that we all make mistakes and they we can grow into strong better people.
Welcome Shanyce, and you know what-- your share was just what I needed to see & hear.
It helps all of us to remember what it was like, the pain & wreckage we have done to friends and family so that we find a way to do things differently.
Yep, I’m an AA fan and a Talking Sober fan, too. Helping others who are addicts and alcoholics is what really makes me feel like I’m doing this recovery the right way.
So glad you’re here and you know we don’t ever need to, or have to drink/use again.
Thank you so much for your response. I’ve been feeling lonely and worthless because of the past trying to show in the present and yesterday was an eye opener that I really don’t want that life anymore. It’s good to join this group and to see that there are others who have struggles like mine. I was feeling very crazy for a minute thinking I’m the only one but it really is refreshing that there is a complete community free from judgment of what we are all going through and can overcome.
Welcome Shanyce,
I’m glad you found us. We are not an AA group. We are from all types of recovery programs. There are many people who do AA here but there are so many ways now to work a recovery program.
This has been a great sober community for me and my sobriety. The more time I spend on here getting and giving support the stronger my recovery becomes.
I just try and work it one day at a time. ODAAT.
Have a good read around and join in when your comfortable.
Thank you for that great welcome . I do see that there are a lot of different addictions that everyone is dealing with on here and that makes me very hopeful that we can all come together and learn to work them out. It sets my mind at ease to know I’m not a special case in terms of my problems. I don’t want to struggle alone anymore. I want to feel good and happy and sober and full of life. I want to stop bringing myself down with the judgement of myself and from others. I am happy this community is welcoming me with open arms because where I am now I do not feel the love and care just abandonment:frowning:. Let today be the start of something new and positive
There’s another great thread where people like to go for daily accountability no matter what your addiction is. It’s call the check in thread. Lots of great people there just trying not to pic up that first drink or DOC. People check in there once or twice or even 3 times a day.
We are definitely stronger in numbers. I could never do it alone. I tried many times and failed.
Thank you, I will be checking out those threads. Yes I have failed way too many times and I’m like something is really wrong. Why do I keep doing this? It’s because I’m alone in the issue and no one around me understands because they don’t have the problem I have in terms of drinking or why I’m drinking.
You’re not alone anymore Shaynice! Welcome to the forum. Indeed coming here, reading, commenting, supporting and being supported, has made me realise I’m not alone. And that realisation-and reality- has been the key to my continued sobriety for the last couple of years. I hope and think it can be for you too! Welcome again and all success lady.
Yes and thank you for the welcome. Honestly tonight was a tough night in regards to me constantly thinking about my mistake from yesterday. I wish people were more forgiving and really gave second chances. Who I am drunk is not who I am soberly but unfortunately once people make up their mind about you it’s pretty much set in stone . I hope things do change for the better for me and anyone else going through it right now. Stay blessed always and once again thank you
Welcome Shanyce! Thank you so much for sharing! When I was reading your post I found myself nodding up and down thinking to myself, “I totally get her, I did that too!”
You are definitely not alone and this group is full of amazing support with tons of fun, inspirational, truthful, sincere and encouraging posts.
Thank you so much for reading my post. It’s amazing to see how many stories are similar to mine. I always felt like a pariah with my drinking. I’m like am I the only one who acts like this?! Maybe I am crazy or something. When I am sober I am nothing like this. Every time I am sober I feel clean and more energized and focused and the day after being drunk I feel mentally drained and guilty and shameful and of course nauseous. This community is full of good things to see and I’m soaking up everything with a happy heart. Will be on here a lot especially for my daily check ins. I feel like everything is going to work out this time and I’m going to be happy.
Welcome and I promise you this community will be a great support system for you. We all have a story and many reset days…some more than others but you’re here now Taking the next step and you should be proud. Remember just take it one day at a time you will get stronger.
Good Morning from New York. Thank you for telling me that. I woke up this morning sad as ever, thinking back on my latest mistake. Forgiveness is a key thing in my mind right now because I may have lost a friend but with this community and taking this step to join where I never thought to before, a weight has been lifted from me. I want to become sober from year. My goal right now is at least 1 month. Let’s do it
Good luck in this new path of sobriety!
We have to be convinced that we can achieve this, it is possible to leave a life without the booze.
As you have said, living without alcohol is even easier: no hidden bottles, no vodka in water ones, no problems at work, no needed to apologise next day…, in my case no depressions after drinking.
It is difficult, I honestly know, I am also in AA, and I have learnt that it is not a case of promising I am not going to drink in the rest of my life, it is just a twenty hour problem: step by step.
Best wishes.
My alcohol journal started with a 30 day alcohol free experiment I did and honestly the thought of 30 days felt extremely overwhelming to say the least. What I found helpful was taking it min by min hour by hour and day by day. Next thing you know 30 days was here and now I’m 9 months and 8 days sober. Just be present and take it a day at a time
Welcome @CloudzBeBlue
Everyone here is super supportive. It’s really helpful just being able to come and vent, read and relate with like minded people. I’ve struggled so much over the years with sobriety. But I keep trying, keep striving to be better and happier.
We deserve it
Glad you’re here!
Wow that’s so amazing. Congratulations on your 9 months. That is great progress:blush:. It really is like that, when you do not think about it and you focus and give yourself a task, without realizing it, you have completed. Sending you out positive energy for you to continue on that journey and to be successful. Thank you so much for your guidance and tips
Thank you so much for the welcome. Yes I can feel the connections already with others. It feels good to see that I am not the only one who can make these kind of mistakes and bounce back and grow. We are all a work in progress and I have to learn to forgive myself and move forward and do my best to not repeat a cycle.
. I hope things do change for the better for me and anyone else going through it right now. Stay blessed always and once again thank you 
welcome to the community
