Welcome S! Being a Mom of 5 sounds busy! 
I haven’t had any kids of my own, but I do have a long history of telling myself I’ve earned that glass (or bottle) of wine after work each day. I also put a lot of effort into trying to manage it and moderate it (weekends only, or only one a night, etc) - until, like you, my inner and outer worlds didn’t match, and my inner world was getting unmanageable.
This app and the people on it have helped me put that glass of wine down for good, at least for well over a year now - all by taking it one day at a time, sometimes one hour or one moment at a time.
Read around, stick around, post, ask questions! The lights are usually always on around here, no matter what hour. 
A lot of people find some good company and accountability/traction in the Daily Check In thread: