I am back again quitting alchohol.
I never have been hard enough on myself to quit!
I drink every night after work it is usually a 6 pack, I hear myself talking me out if it as I pull up to the gas station, but I always feel good walking out with the goods.
Of course I have to have one on the way home (yup I suck)
On my days off I can usually put down a 12 pack and wine .
I hide bottles all over the house to keep it “secret”
I am tired ! I am tired of being a gross drunk every night and feeling sick as hell every morning.
I think I am a functional drunk because I function with tasks all day and I work.
But not anymore this week I feel so sick from drinking and eating no food at all I feel like I can’t function like this anymore.
Here’s what happened this week. I went to my daughter’s wedding and celebrated, thank God I didn’t fall down or do crazy drunk things
I continued to drink for days hard core!!
I had to work in the morning I knew I couldn’t .
Called out then had my 2 days off and drank on those
Then this morning I took myself to quick care and said I felt like I have the flu or something.
This bought me 2 days to wait for a covid test which I KNOW I DONT HAVE.
But it gave me the excuse to detox and not get in trouble at work or look bad .
I have 4 beers in the house and I had to drink one because I am getting the usual detox. I was shaking and when I drank one beer it stopped the shaking and the heart racing.
I don’t have to go back to work until Sunday so I need these 2 days to recover and feel strong again.
I really want to do it this time and never look back at the poison.
Yes I have done AA
But I can’t do it right now I don’t have time to drive there with what is going on in my life right now.
Please can anyone give me advice on how to feel better while I’m coming off the DOC. I FEEL CRAZY
Morning from the UK. I know your situation very well. I have done all those things. This might sound very obvious but the second you have the urge to drink do you know what feeling/emotion triggers it? (Boredom, sadness, loneliness…anger?)
You are here now so do not be hard on yourself! Xxxxx
I have to work on this for real this time I’ve been doing this 30 years.
Your reply just reminded me that while my family was here for my daughter’s wedding .
My aunt who drank decided to remind me again and tell me details of how my mom committed suicide.
Maybe that was why I numbed myself this week.
And my trigger seems to be fighting my night time anxiety (so I can pass out)
Now that I am back I feel like I can get deeper and learn more about why I do what I do.
Already feeling more hopeful that I will do this.
Thank u for making me think BTW Good evening from Las vegas (of all the cities to have addictions)
I totally understand what you are saying. The truth of the matter is NO ONE here (and I’ll vouch for this) drinks cos they are so happy and content with themselves. No one. You dont numb your feelings if you are happy or drink to pass out. There people out there who can sit with their feelings- so please remember you are hurting and that is a massive burden.
I personally believe that every addict should address their inner child alongside recovery - it helps to understand why you are drinking etc.
I hear you with how hard it is to give up but these words stuck out to me. What if you didn’t have to just “function”? What if you got to live? It’s messy and hard but so is drinking.
On the other side of alcohol isn’t bliss or joy but it is freedom. Once you can take the alcohol out of the equation the living gets simpler, not easier but more manageable. You just have to find good enough reasons and distractions to not pick that drink up. Drive a different way home, eat a whole pizza or cake but don’t choose alcohol. Find your reasons, make a plan and get down to the recovery portion of living. Keep at it. I wish you all the best.
Hey Justme. I’m glad your here. I was the quintessential functional drunk. Isn’t it exhausting? Now I look back. It was the most exhausting thing in the world. And you got to be perfect. If you’re not perfect. You can’t drink all the time. So you got to be more than functional. You got to be the best. At least that’s how it was for me.
Gratitude can have such a powerful impact on your life because it engages your brain in a virtuous cycle. Your brain has only so much power to focus its attention. It cannot easily focus on both positive and negative stimuli.
After awhile I got comfortable and started participating more in the forum.
Gratitude works.
I hope to see you around.
In recovery, we either learn to be grateful, or we don’t last.
That nailed it exactly.
I do feel pretty exhausted from the "functioning alcoholic " I Said bye to that nut .
Thank you almost a full day in thus evening.
I definitely will use that gratitude list will start right
away.
After coming on here I have received so many new helpful tools and resources I already feel busy with recovery .
Thanks friend
Thank u this advice here is valuable and good timing my friend.
Slumping in the couch and I’m up and get ready to attempt a cheerful walk around the nearby park
Congratulations on your day 16!
Last night was extremely hard for me , I just want the withdrawals to go away soon so I can work on my next steps.
Thankful I still have my job because it is a very good job and I have lost so many from calling out sick “aka” hungover.
When I am hungover I just say “fuck it” keep sleeping its a no call no show !! Ugh!
I need to make it to day 7 because I remember that was the day when things started to clear out and less foggy sick feelings.
We just have to not drink no matter what right !
Half way through day one!
It’s 2:30 vegas time and I just managed to get out of bed , brush my hair and apply alittle makeup .
LOTS of anxiety knowing I won’t and can’t drink today.
I have today and tomorrow off to build up some strength . Work things I had covid so I have to tell another lie and play along with it when I go back Sunday!!( I am sure most users know we’ll to good how well we can lie) BUT I plan not to be hungover when I go to work yay!
Plan today is walk, the groceries and stock up on kombucha and sparkle waters.
I just have to get through the store with no alchohol in my cart. And I plan to!!
I am literally so pissed off at myself and so sick of feeling sick and screwing up things that I am done!! Done I will be pep talking myself all through this day and checking it.
Thankful for this app
Also trying online meetings for the first time sounds really neat
My pleasure.
This is what we do here.
Another great thread is the Daily Check In thread. It’s a good one to check in to hold yourself accountable and get and give support.
It’s way too hard going alone.
Oh, and don’t even think about going down that Booze isle. You walk right by that shit.
When i was just starting with my sobriety i came here often read alot and just kept coming back. I have to remember all the negative emotions and different bad situations that i been in because of my alcohol consumption, keeps me from romanticizing using or going back the the toxic relationship ive had with excessive drinking and drugging. It takes alot of work but its possible to break from the chains of addiction alot of us here are proof just 1 day at a time. Your here starting your journey thats a good start, stick around and get comfortable, ask for help if you need someone to give suggestions of how to deal with certain triggers, events, or just to celebrate the day being sober.
