As some of you know, I’ve had a new friend in recent weeks accompanying me in my sober journey. He has brought fun, adventures, and cuddles, and not just to me, so I thought I’d share him with all of you and make his antics easy to find.
I’ll also compile the key points of the story so far to catch you up.
I can’t have cats. But I knew, limited only to my imagination, that I could have the next best thing. Imaginary cats.
It was met with amusement and mild concern.
Since I was just fine, I provided my assurances to that effect.
And so Ronin entered a sort of spotlight.
I call him Ronin (meaning “masterless samurai”), mostly out of irony. You see, he’s not respectable, dedicated, and honourable like a real samurai, but his massive ego leads him to believe he is all that and more. He is also masterless in the sense that though he always returns home to me, he does not submit to me or consider me his master. He’s always wandering somewhere. I let him think he’s all noble and independent, and just chuckle to myself when he comes shamelessly begging for salmon.
He’s sassy, needy, has an ego the size of a dump truck, and complains all the time. He is always causing trouble. He also gives the best snuggles and companionship a cat could give.
- Why can’t everyone see him? I don’t know. Some people can’t even see the Tooth Fairy or Santa Claus. They don’t even have imaginary friends . How do they cope with such a bleak existence?
- Does he have a litter box? Yes. How do you clean it? I just don’t think about it, and it goes away.
- How does he travel? When I take him with me, I have to stuff him in my bag or something similar, otherwise he wanders off somewhere else. I do occasionally threaten to FedEx him. What about when he’s by himself? I don’t know. It’s much too fast for a car, and he doesn’t seem to have the same restrictions as planes either. I have suspicions that he employs semi-ballistic suborbital spaceflight.