Hey y’all. I managed to quit drinking and smoking separately for 2 and a half months. I fucked up. I had a drink one night and haven’t stopped it’s been two weeks. I need help. I’m drowning 
inspiration, advice, literally pictures of animals I need something to help me relax and get back on the right track 
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Welcome back 
Some threads you might like to check out
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Im in the same boat… was sober for weeks…took on sip of liquor and just stopped yesterday morning…now im detoxing again and its horrible… just try to rest. Eat…and take vitamin B of you have any…we can do this! Its almost 2023…lets start the new year off right!
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you did it before you can do it again . don’t give up!!! <3
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Hello, new to this community as of today. Can’t sleep, still going through DT’s.
Motivation?!?
Please read my opening post. I’m two threads behind you.
This is what active alcoholism looks like at age 50.
Never too late to start! Never too late to try again!
I wish you the absolute best! 
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@Bashly827 snd @Celliott123
Get back to the basics of what worked for you when you were sober. Keep focused on those tools snd also what caused you to crater.
Sober now… two weeks before 2023! No time like the present.
@Luke101 i haven’t read your post but will.
Lots of help for you here.
You all stick together and get and stay sober!
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Hey!
So I slept through my DT’s from my last horrible bender. 15 hrs straight. Woke up feeling pretty good. First thing I wanted to do was go to the bar, see my friends, and just have “a couple”. Lol.
Instead; I reflected for a while on how I treated my ex when I was on a good couple day tear (we most definitely had our differences but she never deserved my behavior when I was on one), made myself a big healthy breakfast, and shampooed my living room carpet even though it didn’t really need it. The urge passed and I’m somewhat at peace with the world and myself for now again. 3 days now and Im not even thinking about what tomorrow will bring. All I know is that I WILL make it through this one.
How are you doing today? I really hope that all’s cool in the world for you today and you are staying strong!! 
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I’m proud that you made it past the urge!!! I worked and came home and made myself dinner and watched a show in bed. I feel like i could feel my heart racing for hours from anxiety and it’s hard to not have alcohol to help calm it. I am tired of using it as a reason to drink tho. I’m grateful to be ending day 1 knowing I haven’t drank 
we got this
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Thank you everyone for your helpful encouragements. It’s always hard to retrain myself to relax with out my vices. I am so thankful to have a place like this to go to where people understand 
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I’m only on day 7 but compared to day 1 my anxiety has gotten soooo much better without drinking. I’ve relapsed many times so I get what you are feeling. The fact that you are here and not giving up is all that matters. You are resilient and you can do this!! Sending you big hugs and love! 
⚘
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Thank you! This is my 3rd or 4th really trying to stop and the last time I did I thought for sure it would be the last. I was so proud every day. I can’t wait to feel that way again. I always get so disgusted with myself and so much self hate that I make myself so anxious. Im anxious I’m going to mess up again or that people are going to like me less. That I’m not as fun or outgoing. I know it will pass and I’m using it as an excuse to drink I guess. But i get so worried about so many things… I hate thinking of the mistakes I’ve made when black out drunk. It literally churns my stomach and makes me want to cry out if the blue. I need to work toward my future and forget my past. We can only grow right 
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Thank you! Very happy for you as well, way to go!! We do got this!! 
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I finally got it on my way third try of really trying to stop ( I had wishy washy hoped to magically get better for years). It is true once it gets it’s claws in again it is hard to escape again. But not impossible. What are you doing to quit? In any programs?
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I am your Disease - Anonymous
I hate meetings. I hate Higher Power. I hate anyone who has a Program. To all who come in contact with me, I wish you death and I wish you suffering.
Allow me to introduce myself. I am the disease of alcoholism and drug addiction. Cunning, Baffling, and Powerful - That’s me. I have killed millions, and I am pleased. I love to catch you with the element of surprise. I love pretending I am your friend and lover. I was given you comfort, have I not? Wasn’t I there when you were lonely? When you wanted to die, didn’t you call me? I was there. I love to make you hurt. I love to make you cry. Better yet, I love when I make you so numb, you neither hurt nor cry. You can’t feel anything at all. This is true glory. I will give you instant gratification, and all I ask of you is long-term suffering. I’ve been there for you always. When things were going right in your life, you invited me. You said you didn’t deserve these good things, and I was only one who would agree with you. Together, we were able to destroy all the good things in your life.
People don’t take me seriously. They take strokes seriously, heart attacks seriously, even diabetes they take seriously. Fools that they are, they don’t know that without my help these things would not be made possible.
More than you hate me, I hate all of you who have a 12-step Program. Your Program, your meetings, your Higher Power. All weaken me and I can’t function in the manner I am am accustomed to.
Now I must lie here quietly. You don’t see me, but I am growing. Bigger than ever. When you only exist, I may live. When you live, I only exist. But I AM here…and until we meet again, IF we again —- I wish you death and suffering.
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Are you regularly seeking outside support to help with addiction?
I’m not in any programs. I work crazy hours. do you think there are some online programs other then here? This has been such a wonderful help for me.
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Is this your writing?? It is beautiful. I saved it it is so moving. Thank you
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I am not currently in any programs outside of being here as of right now.
No ma’am….I’m not sure who authored this piece; but I keep it close as well!.
It was given to me when I attended inpatient rehab.
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It always begins with our convincing ourselves that we can have “just one”, like normies do. It’s “only one”, how bad can it be?
Maybe, on a rare occasion, we stop at “just one”. We want another, but we’re determined to stop at that “just one” and we manage to white knuckle our way through. Then we’re proud of ourselves for stopping at “just one”. We convince ourselves that since we did it once, we can do it again…and the trap we’ve set is ready for us, the next time we choose to have “just one”.
What took me a long time to realize was I could spend the same amount of energy saying “no” to “just one” that I did to resisting “maybe another”, and got much better results for the effort. Life-changing results. Life-saving results.
Remember how you felt when you regretted taking that first drink. Let it burn into your soul. Compare this to the next time you say “no” to the drink that matters…the first drink.
There’s no comparison. I will never forget that Monday morning 5 years ago, when I said that I never wanted to feel like this again, and actually meant it. Comparing this to waking up each morning, next to the wife who didn’t leave me, with zero shame or regret for drinking the night before. Nope. I am never going back.
You can have this too…if you make it so. So make it so.
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